


Love, Anne

by whats_her_face



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Drinking, F/M, Friends to Strangers to Friends to Strangers to Lovers, Implied Sexual Content, Major character death - Freeform, Some Sexual Content mentioned because its needed for the plot but its not in detail, Some crude language, Unexpected Pregnancy, also in case it wasnt clear this takes place in modern times, but its later on, gilbert has heart eyes for anne in every universe, if i slip up just like let me know but nicely because im sensitive, im american so ill try to be as accurate as possible, might be a little out of character because im going off of a movie, of course i came up with this idea right after it was taken off of netflix, or something like that, parent death mentioned, this is also my first story on here so im sorry in advance, this is the love rosie AU that no one asked for but was needed, time jumps, winnie and roy kinda drew the short stick in this so im sorry to them
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:27:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24386686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whats_her_face/pseuds/whats_her_face
Summary: Anne and Gilbert have been best friends since they were children. They were there for each other through everything, from Anne's horrible haircuts to the death of Gilbert's father. That couldn't possibly mean that they were meant for each other though, right?When it comes to love, life, and making the right choices, these two are their own worst enemies. The decisions Anne and Gilbert make at 18 cause their lives to go hurtling in entirely different directions. But, somehow across time, space, and everything in-between, the tie that binds them together cannot be undone. Can they find their way back to one another, or has their chance at finding true love already passed them by?_____________AU inspired by the incredible film Love, Rosie.
Relationships: Diana Barry/Jerry Baynard, Gilbert Blythe & Anne Shirley, Gilbert Blythe/Anne Shirley, Gilbert Blythe/Ruby Gillis, Gilbert Blythe/Winifred Rose, Royal "Roy" Gardner/Anne Shirley
Comments: 20
Kudos: 65





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> So, I have spent copious hours on here reading fics for this wonderful show, constantly scrolling and looking for new stories to obsess about. I dabbled in writing something for a moment (more specifically, a little Diana/Jerry one-shot that, ultimately, never left the drafts after a certain episode came out), but mostly stuck to reading the amazing works that others made. Until now. The heartache that Love, Rosie caused me the first time I watched it was very similar to the heartache I experienced when I watched Anne with an E. Both had the same idea of timing and how it had the capability to make or break everything so I just couldn't help myself. Please, enjoy.

_Take a deep breath and start at the beginning._

_Tell them about the first day you met, the way he yanked on your braid and called you_ Carrots _because of your fiery red hair. How he earned a mighty smack to the side of the head with a school chalkboard right after he did so._

_Tell them about the Christmas he spent at your house, his first spent home in Avonlea since the death of his father. Tell them how Marilla ordered the both of you to stay behind in the parlor to blow out the candles on the tree, faces lingering close after unintentionally blowing out the last one together-- No. Keep that as our secret._

“Anne? Anne, it’s time.” Diana said, her hand creeping forward to touch the redhead’s freckled arm. 

_Tell them that this is, that this has got to be…_

“Everyone, quiet down!” Someone shouted, the faraway look not breaking from Anne’s face despite how loud the voice had been. 

_One of the happiest days of my life._

“Anne?” She recognized that voice immediately, the cautious and kind tone so familiar to her that it knocked her out of her inner thoughts at once. She couldn’t bring herself to look up at the owner of the voice. Not now. Not _yet_ , she reasoned. Anne avoided even looking in his general direction in fear of making eye contact before she had mentally deemed herself ready. She grabbed at a champagne glass on the table, unsure if it was even her own, and stood from her seat. Diana, who currently sat right beside her in her beautiful blue dress, idly handed over a knife that Anne graciously used to clink against the side of the very expensive looking glass. All at once, hundreds of eyes focused solely on her. Anne was never one to get stage fright when there was attention on her, now long used to the crowds she stood in front of for Aunt Josephine Barry’s legendary soirees, but the feel of his hazel eyes on her was enough to make her squirm self-consciously in the elegant green dress that she wore. She cleared her throat, the scratchiness not easing in the slightest even after she did so. 

“For those of you that I haven’t had the chance to introduce myself to yet, hi, I’m Anne.” She started softly, glancing at all the faces in the vast banquet hall. She hesitated for a moment, then finally found the courage to land on a pair of brilliant hazel eyes. He smiled encouragingly at her, and Anne could barely muster one back. She could feel an awful feeling of dread bubbling closer and closer to the surface the longer she stood there. When his gaze flicked away a moment later to look at the stunning blonde woman next to him, the dread reached its boiling point. Anne watched, almost in slow motion, as he reached over to grab the woman’s hand. She stared painfully as he brought it to his lips to kiss before he interlocked them and placed their hands on top of the woman’s leg. Anne cleared her throat again, the knot within it growing as his gaze met hers once again. 

“This has got to be one of the happiest days of my life.” 

_______

_12 years earlier_

“Happy birthday, Anne!” Everyone shouted in unison before the round of, well, whatever it was that they were drinking had disappeared as quickly as it had come. Anne Shirley-Cuthbert laughed joyfully with her friends as she slammed her shot glass on the counter, the noise barely recognizable over the loud music blasting in the seedy nightclub, which gratefully accepted their somewhat subpar fake ID's, that she and her friends had ended up in while celebrating her eighteenth birthday. She stumbled backwards as she watched Charlie and one of the Paul's try to hold themselves up, her mind just as fuzzy as theirs seemed to be after the amount of alcohol they had all consumed in such a short period of time. Anne would have feared falling flat on her face as she stumbled if two strong arms hadn’t caught her before her brain could catch up to what was happening. She turned in his arms, her grin widening as she looked up at her best friend, Gilbert Blythe. He smiled mischievously at her, cheeks rosy and an eyebrow quirked up. She put her hands on his shoulders, her thoughts going into overtime as she realized that she was forgetting something. Then, when it hit her, her hands retreated to comically cover her mouth, grey eyes wide. 

“I was supposed to bring you a drink!” Anne squealed, though it came out muffled from behind her hands. She had left him on the dance floor, where they had been gathered up together for the past several hours, with promise of another round on her since he had been buying all night. However, upon arriving at the bar, she had run into Jane Andrews who managed to get her to do more shots and completely forget about Gilbert and his promised free beverage. 

“It’s okay,” he promised, guiding them backwards to a portion of the bar that was far less crowded. “I was more worried I lost you.” 

Anne smiled cheekily at him in means of a response as her alcohol-induced brain began to take in her best friend standing in front of her. Gilbert Blythe truly was one of the most handsome boys that she had ever met. He was all the things that a girl would look for in a guy: tall, muscles toned from playing football in school, his hair, dark and curly, always sitting unruly on top of his head. His face was kind, his personality even kinder, with a smile that was bright and eyebrows that were uncontrollable. His eyes were enchantingly hazel, a fan-favorite amongst the girls at their school. Even their snootiest friend, Josie Pye, had a soft spot for those eyes. 

Back in the present, the hazel eyes in question were staring at her curiously, as though he were trying to decipher what she was thinking about. Anne couldn’t help but let out a snorted laugh as his eyebrow quirked up again, seeming to have a mind of their own. 

“What?” Gilbert asked, laughing. She didn’t answer at first, instead took the time to reach forward and cup his face, her thumbs beginning to trace over his eyebrows as she tried to focus her fuzzy mind on them. She vaguely felt his arms tighten around her, his expression unreadable. 

“Your eyebrows..” She said slowly, her voice trailing off into a fit of giggles. “They always seem to be talking… Giving away how you feel.” Anne rambled, thumbs finally ceasing their movement, but not moving away. She felt them flex under her thumbs, giving away emotions that neither drunk nor sober Anne can ever identify. Her hands left his face, returning once more to his shoulders so she could wrap them around his neck and pull him into a hug. Anne felt safe in his arms, a comfortable spot that she could always count on being there. His head was bent down and so close to her that she could feel his warm breath fan across her neck. 

“Did they tell you anything, Anne?” Gilbert whispered, his voice so quiet that she doesn’t think she would have heard it if he wasn’t standing as closely to her as he was. Anne pulled back ever so slightly, their faces just mere inches apart. His eyes were half-open, eyebrows pulled down and speaking a language she didn’t understand. Ultimately, she is the one that closes the distance between them. Anne had kissed her fair share of boys, but she had never kissed a boy like Gilbert Blythe before. It was hesitant, their lips meeting shyly, and she is taken back by how soft and tender it feels to be kissing her best friend. He pulled away from her first, his expression unreadable as her vision began to go shaky. 

“I’m..” Anne said dizzily, head spinning. “Pirate?” She asked, and a moment later she slipped right out of a confused Gilbert’s arms. This time, however, his instincts weren’t fast enough to grab her again, his own mind reeling. Anne hit the ground hard, though she had already passed out by the time her head hit the grubby bar floor.


	2. From Hangovers to Dances

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Some Sexual Content is present in this chapter. It's not graphic or anything, but it is there. I hope everyone is staying safe, and I hope you all enjoy this chapter. It is somewhat edited, but I just finished it right now (2 AM) and wanted to post it as soon as I was done since I spent the whole day writing it instead of an assignment for my psychology class.

Anne woke the next morning safely tucked in the bed of her east gable room. 

Her brain felt as though it had been liquefied, the natural light flooding into the room only feeding the horrendous headache forming at her temple. She rolled herself away from the window, taking her duvet with her to create a burrito that she was blissfully in the middle of. Anne reached up to soothe her head, hoping to relieve some of the throbbing, but winced as her fingertips grazed a rather large bump on the side of it. She gingerly touched it, hardly remembering how she managed to hurt herself so badly the night previously. Anne remembered a trip to the emergency room near the end of her birthday celebration, but it definitely hadn’t been because of a bump to her head. She recoiled instantly at the memory of her stomach needing to be pumped as she heard voices speaking below. 

Downstairs, Marilla Cuthbert had just let a sheepishly disheveled Gilbert Blythe through her front door. She wiped her floury hands down her apron before they found her hips in an authoritative stance, a stern look on her face as she eyed her daughter’s best friend accusingly. 

“It was all my fault, Ms. Cuthbert, the whole thing.” He said in lieu of a greeting, his arms up in surrender as he walked through the doorway. 

“I would love to believe you, Gilbert, but I happen to know my Anne too well.” She said back, her stance dropping so she could close the door. Anne had been adopted seven years previously by Marilla and her brother Matthew, and for that reason, they had long since gotten used to hearing that she had gotten herself into a precarious situation. Now, not even wondering if Gilbert Blythe had been an accomplice by her side. 

“A fine doctor you’ll make,” she scolded as they both turned to look at the staircase when a creak on the floorboards was heard, “if this is how you carry on.” She finished, pointing up to where Anne had appeared on the stairs, blanket pulled tightly around her.

“Why is everybody shouting?” Anne asked, slumping against the wall of the stairs. Gilbert couldn’t help but smile as he looked up at her. He threw a polite nod Marilla’s way, who rolled her eyes at him as she went back to her half-finished pie, and followed Anne up the stairs and into her bedroom. 

“Don’t ever let me drink again.” Anne complained, falling face first onto her bed, the only part of her that now could be seen being her bare feet. “I can’t believe I did all of that last night. It was horrible, I feel sick even just thinking about it.” She said, voice muffled by her face being mushed up against the blanket. She felt Gilbert’s weight dip down the bed a moment later, his hand patting her back. 

“Which part?” He asked, his hand beginning to rub her blanket-covered back reassuringly. 

“All of it!” Anne insisted. “It never happened, okay? Gilbert, you have to promise that you’ll never tell anyone.” She pleaded, his hand stopping its motions at once. She pulled herself up to look at him, his arm retreating to his lap. It was already bad enough that their peers loved to talk about her atrocious red hair and the freckles that loved to fester on every inch of her body. The last thing she wanted was for them to get wind that she had to get her stomach pumped the night of her birthday. Anne met his gaze, another indistinguishable expression on his face, his eyebrows pulled down. He cleared his throat slowly, eyeing her before he turned away to pull himself toward the edge of the bed. 

“Gil?” Anne asked, curious about his odd behavior. 

“I promise.” Gilbert said, finally turning to look at her again. “Secret is safe with me.” 

“Good,” Anne whispered, unsure of the odd atmosphere that had appeared in the room, “but how did we get home from the hospital last night?” She suddenly asked. While she vividly remembered the _act_ of having her stomach pumped, everything else around that impromptu hospital visit was a bit fuzzy.

“I, uh, called Bash.” Gilbert said. “They needed a parents name, and I obviously didn’t want to give yours.” 

Anne moved closer to him, pulling her blanket to her chin. 

“Was he mad?” She asked, and Gilbert pulled a face.

“He wasn’t really, but Mary and Hazel have convinced him that he ought to punish me so I learn my actions have consequences. For the next two weeks, I have to tutor Billy Andrews in the library after school.” 

“Bummer,” Anne said. Billy Andrews could quite possibly be one of the worst boys she ever had the displeasure of knowing. Brother to their dear friend Jane, Billy was the leader of those that enjoyed making fun of her. Even though Gilbert and him had gotten into more than a few altercations in the past, Billy was still persistent in trying to befriend Gilbert. If Anne remembered correctly, the last time they had gotten into a fight had been just after the death of Gilbert’s father a few years previously. Billy had made the apparent mistake of badmouthing Anne in front of him, and paid the price when Gilbert socked him right in the face. 

“Well,” He said, smiling as he turned to her. “It’s not _all_ bad. Winifred Rose just got a part-time job there.” 

“ _Winifred Rose?_ ” Anne laughed, her blanket falling. “Forget it, even I want to sleep with her.” 

“For your information, she has been giving me the eye.” 

“She’s probably just wondering why you haven’t squeezed that zit on your forehead.” She said, reaching forward to grab his face. He tried to pull away, laughing. 

“Fuck off.”

“No, come here, let me get it for you.” She said, moving to try to reach it. Gilbert grabbed her arms, trying to get her away as they both laughed, the tense moment from earlier forgotten. 

__________

The next weekend, Anne and Gilbert found themselves amongst their friends and other peers at the ruins. The ruins seemed to be one of the few places in Avonlea that the parents didn’t know about, and for that reason, it was a local hotspot for parties. The two best friends were currently sitting on an old tree log together, a drink periodically being passed back and forth between them. 

“Look at Royal Gardner over there,” Gilbert scowled, “what a complete dickhead.” 

Anne turned to look at Roy, humming. He was playing a friendly game of soccer with a few of their other classmates. Anne could hear his laugh echoing from where she sat as he jumped on the back of the player that had just made the ball go into the makeshift goal. Anne didn’t know if she agreed that Royal Gardner was a dickhead, instead, she thought that he was simply misunderstood. Anne pictured him as the mysterious, brooding boy that she could see being in one of her romance novels. In fact, he even _looked_ the part by being the practical definition of tall, dark, and handsome. 

“You don’t even know him,” she said, after taking a sip from their cup. “He invited me to the school dance.”

“What did you say?” Gilbert asked quietly, taking the cup and finishing the contents within it. 

“No, obviously. I’m going with you.” Anne said back, smiling at him. “Just like always.” 

Before Gilbert could respond, Winifred Rose was stopping right in front of them. Winnie Rose was a beautiful girl, don’t get Anne wrong. She had luscious blonde hair that always flowed behind her in ringlets, a kind face with perfected makeup that made her blue eyes pop and her lips look full, and even had an inviting British accent to pull it all together. Anne couldn’t _not_ like Winnie, who was oftentimes nice to her, but there was just something that she couldn’t pinpoint that made her _want_ to dislike her. 

“Hi, Gilbert.” Winnie said, smiling. “I missed you in the library yesterday.”

“Yeah.. Uh, Billy couldn’t… So I didn’t..” Gilbert stammered, and Anne’s eyebrows shot up over his awkwardness. 

“Don’t be a stranger.” She grinned seductively as she turned away, moving in the direction where her friends were giggling profusely. 

“Yeah, I’ll see you there.” Gilbert said, but Winnie was already out of earshot. He watched her right up until Anne whacked him on the arm.

“That was pathetic.” Anne declared, earning a scoff from Gilbert. 

“She definitely likes me.” 

“You’re lucky she didn’t trip over your tongue dragging halfway across the ground.” Anne told him dramatically. 

“Whoa, okay.” He said, holding his hands up. “Then give me some tips if you think you’re so clever. How do I go about seducing a woman that is _apparently_ out of my league?”

“Is that a serious question?” Anne asked, giving him a questioning look. Gilbert nodded, his lips forming a smile.

“Yes, absolutely, it is.”

“Well, you’re at a disadvantage being a, you know..” She said, moving closer so she could whisper. “ _Virgin._ ” Gilbert shook his head at once, looking down.

“No, no, no! It’s okay, we can work with that.” Anne said, grabbing his arm so he would look up. “First, you have to be cool, ignore her. Make her believe that you can take it or leave it.”

“My father would be rolling in his grave if he could hear you and your ungentlemanly antics.” Gilbert said, smiling softly. 

“John Blythe would be happy knowing that I am trying to help his desperate son.” Anne refuted, her hand going up to silence him. “Second, you have to pretend like you see something in her that no one else has. Like, her soul.”

“While also ignoring her?” He asked.

“ _Yes._ ” She said back, a serious look on her face before it broke and they both began to laugh.

After their laughter quieted down, it was gravely silent between them for a long moment. Gilbert was looking away at something in the distance, not meeting the gaze that she still had on him. 

“She wants me to take her to the dance.” He revealed, a sober look on his features. 

“Really?” Anne asked, a bittersweet feeling blooming in her stomach. They had gone to every dance as each other’s date, but with a heavy heart, Anne realized that it didn’t mean that they would always have to do so. 

“Take her, then. If it means that much to you.” She whispered, looking down at the log they still sat on. 

“Come on, you’d have no one to go with.” He said, bumping his shoulder with hers. Anne looked up again, this time meeting his eyes. 

“Uh..” She said softly. “I got asked by the hottest guy in our grade, Gil. I think I’m fine.” She expected for him to smile, perhaps jump up and down because he was free to take Winnie to the dance, but he did neither. His eyebrows only moving downwards on his handsome face. 

“This is actually quite convenient for you.” He said, his jaw twitching. All Anne could do was nod once, her head feeling robotic as she did. 

“I guess I’ll go ask her then.” Gilbert concluded, watching her. 

“Go for it.” Anne answered back, shrugging. 

“Fine, I will.” He said, standing up from the log and heading in the direction Winnie had just gone. All Anne could do was watch, wondering why she already regretted her words. 

__________

Anne sat in her last class of the day, her mind wandering to the dress she planned to wear to the dance later that night, when she got a notification on her school computer. She clicked on it at once, her eyes roaming to the other side of the classroom where Gilbert sat. 

**GilbyBlythe:** I have news.

**AnneWithAnE:** Oh? Do tell, Mr. Blythe.

**GilbyBlythe:** Virgin boy is no longer.

Anne stared at the screen, motionless. 

**GilbyBlythe:** Are you still there?

**AnneWithAnE:** Who is the unlucky girl?

_Not Winnie. Not Winnie. Please, not Winnie._

**GilbyBlythe:** Winnie.

“Fuck,” Anne said loudly, the entire class looking up at her. 

“Right, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, off to the principal's office.” Mr. Phillips said, hand pointing toward the door. Gilbert jumped out of his seat, ready to defend her. 

“Mr. Phillips, wait, it was my fault. I had to tell her something.” He said.

“Aw, yes, I see. Congratulations, Mr. Blythe.” Mr. Phillips said as he put the messages between Anne and Gilbert on the big monitor for the class to see. Anne turned away from his direction, the class erupting into cheers for Gilbert as she walked out of the room. 

__________

She had just finished curling her hair when Anne heard someone knocking on her bedroom door. When she pulled it open, standing in the doorway, was Gilbert Blythe in a nice jacket, button-up shirt, and slacks. Anne gave him an unapproving look, her head resting on the door. 

“I know we aren’t technically talking, but I need help with my tie.” Gilbert said, holding up a tie that looked as though it had been tied in a knot. 

Anne rolled her eyes, opening the door and stepping aside with a small smile. “Come on, then.” 

Gilbert walked through the door with a smug expression, handing his tie off to her. Anne spent a moment undoing it, cursing at how tight the knot in it was before she walked over to him, pulling the tie around his neck. She took her time with tying it, thinking about how she had taken on this particular role since his father died. The first time she had done it had been for John Blythe’s funeral. She had stood there in front of him after, letting him cry into her shoulder right until the moment Marilla had collected them to go to the church for his service. 

Presently, Anne was smoothing over Gilbert’s shirt collar, admiring her work. 

“Thank you, and I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have dropped that bomb on you like that, I was just excited.” He whispered. Anne pulled away from him, turning away completely. 

“It’s okay.” 

Anne moved toward her fitted purple dress, trying to end the conversation when she ordered him to turn around so she could change. Gilbert didn’t complain, or take the hint, as he turned around. 

“You know, for a second there I thought you might be in love with me or something.” He commented lightly as Anne slid the dress over her slight curves.

“Gilbert, you will always be the boy that pulled my hair and compared it to a vegetable.” Anne said idly, looking at her herself in the mirror. 

“You do know that it’s been seven years, right?” Gilbert asked, turning around when Anne tapped his shoulder.

“You did it in front of the whole class, I’m allowed to bring it up whenever I want.” She quipped back. “Zip me?” She asked after, turning around to show him her exposed back. Anne felt his hand ghost against her, making her shiver, his fingertips touching the exposed skin before they found the zipper and pulled it all the way up. Anne turned around, looking up to meet Gilbert’s gaze. 

“Thanks,” She whispered, swallowing thickly. 

“Anytime,” Gilbert whispered back. “You look beautiful, Anne.” 

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” she said. “Winifred is a lucky girl.” 

Gilbert looked down, a twitch in his jaw. 

“Are you ready to go?” He asked a moment later. Anne nodded quickly, flipping the light switch as she slipped her feet into her matching heels. Gilbert drove them to the venue of the dance, their dates promising to meet them at the front. She couldn’t precisely describe the tense atmosphere in his car, but it was palpable to say the least. Anne was just glad to escape when they pulled into the parking lot. 

“Hello, gorgeous.” Roy whistled, opening her door. 

“Hey, you.” She said back, waving goodbye to Gilbert. She is almost convinced she heard him mutter ‘dickhead’ as they walked away but she can’t be certain of it.

As it turned out, Royal Gardner was quite an interesting date. The two got along fine enough, though they hardly needed to get to know each other in order to dance. The hours seemed to blend together as Roy twirled her around and around. Every so often, however, Anne’s smile would falter when she found Gilbert and Winnie in the crowd. As she looked over now, Anne could feel her heart drop unexpectedly when she saw them in the middle of a rather passionate kiss. She turned back toward Roy, pulled him close so she could whisper in his ear. 

“Do you want to get out of here?” 

“Yeah,” He said, his smile charming. "Let's go." 

__________

Royal Gardner was a _very_ good kisser. 

Since the venue had been held at a hotel, Roy had simply rented a room that they were able to escape to. Anne pulled his tie from his body as his hands worked at unzipping her dress. Anne and Roy kissed right up until there was not an ounce of clothing between them. He pulled away, moving to the edge of the bed to grab at his pants on the floor. A moment later, he held up a single condom in the air proudly. She went up behind him, kissing the back of his neck as he opened it with his teeth. Anne watched as he tried to slip it on, but struggled to do so. 

“Fuck!” He said, as his hands fumbled to put it on.

“You have done this before, right?” Anne said, wincing as she watched him. 

“Of course I have! Haven’t you?” He quipped back. 

“It’s like brushing my teeth.” She said sarcastically, “Look.. Let me just help you.”

“Shit, no, it’s fine. I’ve got it.” He said, and Anne heard it snap against his skin. “Hurry, quick. Quick. Let’s do this.” Roy ordered, turning in bed to cage her body under his. Anne had just wrapped her legs around his torso before he had entered her all at once. 

“Oh, God.” He moaned, “oh, fuck.” 

What only felt like a moment later, or what was perhaps three thrusts from what she counted, it was all over and Roy was rolling over with a satisfying smile on his face. Anne moved into the crook of his arm, tapping his chest as he kissed her forehead.

“Wow,” She said slowly, trying to understand the last thirty seconds of her life. 

“I know.” Roy said back, smiling as Anne’s hand snaked down his chest so she could take the condom off of him to dispose of. However, when she got down there, she didn’t feel anything. 

“Where is it?” She asked, pulling up the blanket. 

“Where’s what?” Roy asked, confusion laced in his voice as Anne began to search the bed frantically. 

“The _thing_. Where is it?” She asked, sitting up. 

“I don’t know, you had it!” 

“Why would _I_ have it? It was on you!” She scoffed loudly. Anne continued searching until a thought hit her, and her hand flew to the spot between her legs. She jumped up from the bed, leaving Roy behind, and flew into the bathroom, her hair flying behind her. Anne grabbed at the tiny mirror in the bathroom, frantic, and brought it to the floor as she began to look for the lost condom. After several minutes of trying to locate it with no luck, Roy knocked on the door.

“Did you find it?” He asked. “Do you want me to have a look?” 

“Really?” 

“Yeah, get on all fours.” He said, laughing as he walked away.

“Fuck off, Roy!” Anne shouted back, abandoning the mirror as she stood. She moved back into the hotel room. She frantically slipped back into her underwear, skipping over her dress to grab Roy’s button-up shirt. She picked up her phone as she buttoned the shirt with only one hand. Anne didn’t think as she ran through the halls as fast as she could while dialing Gilbert’s number. It rang only twice before Anne could hear the sound of loud music on the other side. 

“Anne?” Gilbert questioned, muffled. 

“Gilbert! Thank God, where are you?” She asked, frantically pushing the elevator button. 

“I’m on my way out.”

“There’s been an..” Anne shouted as the elevator doors opened, revealing an older gentleman in the corner. “Accident.”

“Fuck, what happened?” Gilbert asked, concern laced in his voice. 

“No, no, sorry, not that kind of accident.” She said quickly, checking that the lobby button had been pressed. 

“You scared me!” 

“I mean, there was an accident. With the thingy, with Roy, you know?” She stammered, her thoughts running a mile a minute. 

“Anne, sometimes that happens--” He tried saying but Anne cut him off. 

“No, not that! Gilbert, I need to get rid of it and I can’t find it! Please, I need help.” Anne pleaded.

“Okay, listen, you need to be very clear and very precise with me right now. What is wrong?” He asked, his soothing voice now more easy to understand. Anne gave a quick look at the man in the elevator with her, biting her lip as she took a deep breath. 

“The condom came off inside my vagina and at present I am unable to locate it.” She said quickly, the doors opening to reveal Gilbert and Winifred on the other side. 

“That was way more information than I needed.” Gilbert said, pulling the phone away from his ear to stare at her.


	3. Oh, Baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay safe, folks.

“That had to have been one of most embarrassing moments in my entire pathetic existence.” Anne whispered later that night, her knees pulled to her chest as she stared at the boy sitting next to her. 

Anne and Gilbert sat parked in his car outside of Green Gables, the darkness of the night surrounding them. After her phone call to him a few hours earlier, they had been forced to make a quick trip to the emergency room to deal with her _dilemma_. Anne cringed, realizing she had visited the local hospital more times in the last month than in her whole life. 

“You know what?” Gilbert whispered back idly, turning his head against the seat to look at her. “Let’s get out of here.” 

“The diner should still be open--”

“ _Actually,_ ” Gilbert said slowly, “I was thinking more Boston, Massachusetts.”

“You think I should flee the country?” Anne laughed. 

“I’m serious. This place is a dead end, we’ve been saying it for years.” He said. Anne watched him as he spoke, taking in the expression on his face. “Ms. Stacy thinks I should try for Harvard. She knows people that would overlook a late application, which maybe isn't that ethical but... ” 

“You are serious.” She said, her bare feet slipping down to the floor of the car. 

“It has one of the best medical schools in the world.” He said confidently. “ _And,_ Boston University happens to have a really great education program. That is what you want to do still, right? Be a teacher?”

Anne pondered his idea, her smile growing larger and larger the longer she did. 

__________

As it turned out, Marilla Cuthbert was not as enthusiastic with the idea of Boston University as Anne was. 

“Absolutely not!” She protested. “Who will do your laundry? And feed you? You’ll never eat! This is ridiculous.” 

Anne was currently sitting across from her adoptive parents in their parlor. Anne had just dropped the possibility of leaving Canada to pursue further education in the States, and as predicted, her mother had something to say about it. Anne flicked her braid over her shoulder, inching forward so she could grab Marilla’s clenched hands and look into her worry-stricken eyes.

“They have food in America, Marilla, and I’m _guessing_ they have washing machines, too.” Anne said tenderly, her eyes crinkling as she smiled reassuringly at the woman. 

“It’s so far away.” Marilla grumbled, looking at Matthew. “I mean, talk to her, Matthew!”

Anne looked over at Matthew with hope shining in her eyes. Her adoptive father was a man with few words, but never failed to support her through each and every new adventure that she sought out. He had been the one to fight for her to stay at Green Gables when her case worker had suggested sending Anne back to a group home that she had been in and out of for several years. Matthew had shouted at the woman on the phone at the lunacy of suggesting that he and Marilla give up their daughter. Anne had beamed for the rest of the day, having never been called someone’s _daughter_ before, and the adoption process began later that very week. 

“Come on, Anne,” Matthew said in the present, standing up from his chair, “let's take a walk.” 

Anne turned back to Marilla, patted her hands softly, and stood to follow Matthew out the back door. They were quiet as they strolled toward the tall barn a little ways from the house. Green Gables was still a functioning farm, though, most of the land and livestock had been sold throughout the years. In its prime, Matthew was able run the farm by himself, but as he got older and his heart got weaker, he was forced to sell and hire a few farmhands to assist with the workload that they still had. As they entered, Matthew handed her a hard-bristled brush. Anne moved toward their horse, his plan now revealed, and opened the gate to the stall.

“Hello, my beautiful Belle. How are you on this exquisite day?” She murmured softly, petting the horse’s head. Anne moved over when Matthew came into the stall a moment later, a brush in his own hand. The two worked in silence for a while as they focused on Belle’s coat. Finally, Matthew spoke. 

“You never knew my mother,” He said idly, “but after my brother-- after _Michael_ died, she was never the same.” 

“I can’t even imagine the heartbreak of losing a son.” Anne whispered, meeting his eye from the other side of their beloved horse. Matthew nodded slowly, looking down again.

“Toward the end, she was a terribly cynical woman. Her favorite phrase was ‘ _not for the likes of us._ ’ She used to say it to Marilla and me all the time.” He said. “When you first told us your plan, it was the first thing that popped into my head. I could hear her voice in the room saying it. I don’t ever want that voice to be in your head.” 

Anne stopped brushing so she could look at him. There was very little that she knew about the Cuthbert’s parents besides the fact that they were the original owners of Green Gables, and that they had lost their oldest son when he was just a teenager. 

“Do you ever wish that you had more? That you would have if she hadn’t always been telling you that?” Anne asked quietly. 

“Well,” Matthew hesitated, meeting her eye once again. “I suppose that sometimes I imagine what would have happened had life turned out differently. But, if I made different choices, I would have never met you, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, and what a dull life that would have been.” Anne moved toward him at once, her arms thrown over him so she could give him a hug. She pulled back, a conflicted look on her face. 

“If I go to Boston, Marilla will never speak to me again.” She said dramatically. 

“But if you don’t go to Boston,” He said, smiling knowingly at her. “Then, _I_ won’t. It's your choice.” 

Anne laughed, pulling her father in for another bone-crushing hug.

__________

Anne has always enjoyed the walk from Avonlea High to Green Gables. She didn’t often get to make the trek anymore since Gilbert often picked her up and dropped her off nowadays. However, on days like today when Anne’s stomach began to feel queasy halfway through Gilbert’s post-season after school practice, she decided it was best for her to just make her way home by herself. She would usually stop as she went, picking up flowers to make crowns or to sit under a tree to read a book, but the continued rolling of her stomach had her skipping past all of her normal rituals. 

As she strolled up the drive toward Green Gables, she instinctively stopped at the mailbox. She pulled the contents out half-heartedly, flipping through different bills addressed to the Cuthberts until she got to the very last one. It was addressed to her, and from Boston University. She dumped the other mail on the side table as she walked through the front door, opening the envelope as she did. 

“‘Dear Miss Shirley-Cuthbert, congratulations! We are pleased to offer you admission to Boston University’-- Oh my god. No way, I got in! I got in!” Anne shouted as she read from the letter. She didn't wait a moment before she ran back out of the house, her backpack still perched on her shoulders. She ran almost the whole way to Gilbert’s house, hoping that despite all of the shortcuts through the woods and a few people’s backyards, that he still got done with practice and beat her to his home. When she arrived at the familiar Blythe-Lacroix homestead, Gilbert’s beat-up truck, once owned by John Blythe, was parked out front. 

Anne walked past it, going up the porch steps so she could knock on the door. She stepped back, idly looking at the letter in her hand until the front door opened and revealed Hazel Lacroix and her granddaughter, Delphine. 

“Hello, Mrs. Lacroix. Oh, Dellie, you look like you’ve grown just since I saw you a few days ago!” Anne gushed, staring at the almost three year old before turning her attention back to Mrs. Lacroix. “I’m here to see Gilbert.” 

“He’s tied up at the moment.” Mrs. Lacroix said with her thick Trinidadian accent, her hand finding the top of Delphine’s head as she wrapped her arms around her leg. 

“I can come back--” She said instantly, though, her breath was still slightly heavy from her initial run there. Mrs. Lacroix rolled her eyes as she moved out of the doorway with Delphine, welcoming her in. 

“I say he’ll be down in about three minutes, come in.” She said, rolling her eyes. Anne followed her and Delphine into the kitchen, declining a glass of water as Mrs. Lacroix helped Dellie into a chair. Anne sat down in the seat across from her, watching them together. When Gilbert’s father had died five years ago, he had been placed in the custody of their close family friend Sebastian. Him and his wife, Mary, took Gilbert in without a second thought, but the distance from Avonlea to their home in Charlottetown meant that he had to leave everything behind when he went to live with them. Anne knew that they were as much his family as his own father had been, but Anne had still worried about him. Being unable to be there for him was difficult for Anne, and she had been more than delighted when they moved back to Avonlea a few years ago to live in Gilbert's old home. Since they moved back, Bash and Mary had welcomed a daughter and had Bash's mother move in full-time to help after the birth. 

Anne was right in the middle of thinking about how they had only exchanged one letter to one when he was in Charlottetown with the Lacroix's when she heard a gruntled female moan from upstairs. 

“Oh, baby!” The female voice shouted. “Give it to me, baby!”

She looked toward Mrs. Lacroix, startled. “Oh my God, is that… Is that?” Anne whispered, her stomach turning as she imagined what was happening upstairs. 

“Winifred Rose.” Mrs. Lacroix confirmed, a look up disgust crossing her face as Winnie moaned loudly again. 

“So, when you said he was tied up....” Anne started, queasy. “You _actually_ meant he was…”

“Tied up.” Mrs. Lacroix said, filling in the words when she trailed in. “He used to be such a good boy until he started getting _laid_!” She grumbled, turning back to tell Delphine to finish her apple slices. 

“I should go..” Anne said, beginning to stand. 

“Any second now!” Mrs. Lacroix said sarcastically, her arms flailing out before resting on her hips. From above them, the female moans began to intensify. 

“Oh, Gilbert!” Winnie screamed. “Where did you learn to do _that_?” 

At that moment, Anne’s stomach couldn’t take it anymore, and in an instant, she was throwing up into the trash can by her chair. When she recovered, Mrs. Lacroix was looking at her, a stern look mixed with concern in her eyes. 

“I know it is repulsive,” She started, “but you don’t have to lose your lunch over it.” 

Anne made a face before turning to try help clean up the mess she had just made in the trash.

“No, no, leave it.” Mrs. Lacroix ordered. “I’ll clean it up, don’t worry.” Anne opened her mouth to protest, but shut it when she saw the look on the other woman’s face. Anne stood up straight and tried to smile at the woman.

“Thank you, Mrs. Lacroix.” Anne said. “I think I’m just gonna go, I'm not feeling too well. You don’t have to tell Gilbert I stopped by.” 

Mrs. Lacroix nodded once, and Anne showed herself out before either Gilbert or Winifred came downstairs and found her there. She wandered away from his home with her mind buzzing with a million different thoughts all at once. She pushed the ones about Gilbert’s apparent active sex life away, instead focusing on what she needed to do about her random vomiting episodes that had become part of her routine over the past week. Anne hopped on the local bus and rode it to the middle of the town. She walked the streets aimlessly until she stopped directly in front of _Barry’s Pharmaceuticals_. She’d only been inside twice before, once to get migraine pills for Marilla and the other to get Matthew’s heart medicine refilled. When Anne entered the shop, dim lighting and obvious loud rock music filled her senses. 

“Hello?” Anne called out, gripping the sides of her backpack. 

“Fuck, I’m coming!” She heard a voice vaguely say from the back. The music’s volume suddenly lowered, and a moment later, a woman about Anne’s age came strolling out of the back room. She blew her dark hair, which was mixed brilliantly with blue highlights, out of her face as she came to rest her arms on the counter. Anne moved toward her, close enough that she could see that her name tag had _Diana_ scribbled in cursive on the entirety of it. She had an unlit cigarette in her mouth, as though she had just been about to light it before she had walked in. 

“Are you supposed to smoke in here?” She asked the girl, Diana, tentatively. 

“My parents own the place. They want me to help out? Then I set the terms. What’s up?” She said, one hand moving the unlit cigarette to sit on her ear. 

“Uh, well, I’ve been feeling sick, like, every day for a week. I was wondering if I can get some sort of nausea pill or something.” Anne stammered, gripping her backpack harder. Diana grabbed a clipboard beside the cash register, scanning it. 

“Any diarrhea?” She questioned.

“No.”

“Fever?”

“No.”

“Stomach cramps?” 

“No.”

“Have you missed a period?” Diana asked, placing the clipboard on the counter. Anne stared at her, motionless. 

“Yes.” She finally said, crossing her arms. Diana grabbed something to the side of her, and placed it on the counter for Anne to see. Anne fumbled for a minute, staring at the pregnancy test. 

“Uh, no.” She insisted at once, her mind reeling. 

“Virgin?” Diana questioned, head cocking to the side. 

“No,” Anne said at once, “but I took the morning after pill.” 

“90% is safe, but 10% is the catch.” Diana told her, shaking her head lightly as Anne felt dizzy, realization dawning heavily on her. “There’s a bathroom here if you want to use it.” 

She only nodded slowly, grabbing the pregnancy test, and followed Diana to the back of the store. Anne read all of the directions with concentrated perfection, her mind void of any and all thoughts. It wasn’t until she was done and the five minutes it took for results came and went that she opened the door. Diana was waiting on the other side, and peered down at the test in her hands when Anne revealed it to her.

“Shit,” Diana whispered. 

“Shit, indeed.” Anne agreed, staring quietly at the tiny pink plus sign. 

__________

Anne could barely recall how she got home later that night. She could remember leaving the pharmacy after speaking to Diana a little longer, but she couldn’t remember what they said to one another. She could vaguely remember taking the bus back, and accidentally getting off two stops before she’s supposed to. The walk home is where she truly draws a blank. One moment she was getting off the bus, and the next she was walking through the door of Green Gables.

“Anne? Anne, is that you?” She heard Marilla ask from the kitchen. Her backpack slipped from her shoulders to the ground, her shoes soon following it. Anne moved toward the kitchen where Matthew and Marilla were sitting, their dinner spread out between them

“You didn’t answer me,” Marilla scolded watching Anne as she walked past the table. “We’ve been calling you all day. I heard you come home yelling about something or another, and then you disappeared for five hours!” 

“Sorry, Marilla.” Anne said quietly, her hand grasping the railing on the stairs.

“You aren’t going to eat?” Matthew asked, and Anne’s throat felt incredibly tight.

“I ate with Gilbert.” She lied, walking up the stairs without another word to either of her adoptive parents. Anne shut herself into her room, locking the door behind her as she pulled her phone out to text the only boy she wanted to talk to. 

**AnneWithAnE** : S.O.S

**AnneWithAnE** : I need to talk to you.

**GilbyBlythe** : Hey, anyway it can wait until later? I’m on my way to meet Winnie’s parents for dinner at some upscale restaurant in Charlottetown. 

Anne’s fingers fly across her screen in a sudden blind rage. 

_FUCK THE DINNER! FUCK WINNIE! FUCK WINNIE’S PARENTS! AND FUCK YOU!!_

Her thumb hesitated over the send button before moving to erase the whole message. 

**AnneWithAnE** : Yeah, that’s fine. 

**AnneWithAnE** : Enjoy your dinner. 

Anne threw her phone toward the corner of the room as she moved to lay down on her bed. She stared at the ceiling numbly, the little glow-in-the-dark stars she got when she was twelve staring back down at her. Anne didn’t bother to fight the tears that spilled down her freckled cheeks. She grabbed at a throw pillow from her bed to silence the sobs that wracked through her entire body uncontrollably, unable to think of a time when she felt as helpless as she did at this moment.


	4. The Inevitable Decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, folks! I'm sorry for the (semi) late update, but I have been truly busy. I graduated from high school on the fifth, and it was an experience to say the least. We had a nice little car parade and afterward got to go pick up our diplomas and take (social distancing) pictures! Then, on the sixth, we went to Las Vegas to celebrate that and my moms birthday. We took as many safety precautions as we could, and had an amazing time. So, now I'm back in town and doing some writing. I had a bit writer's block with this one, and had to get creative with a few parts since Love, Rosie was either too vague or just outright didn't make sense (like Alex having to leave three days after he got his acceptance letter. Like, what the?) but I hope you all enjoy how this chapter turned out!

Anne avoided Gilbert as much as she could over the next two weeks. She didn’t even _mean_ to shut him out the way that she did. However, after Gilbert unintentionally blew her off for Winnie the night she found out she was pregnant, a horrible case of resentment that she knew he didn’t deserve began to grow within her. Anne _knew_ that if she had told him the news that he would’ve likely dropped everything to come be with her, but she was nothing if not stubborn, so the resentment continued to brew. Graduation came exactly a week after she got her life-altering news, and the ceremony had been tense to say the least. She had given Gilbert the cold-shoulder despite his many attempts of starting a conversation, and after the ceremony, she disappeared into the crowd with Matthew and Marilla trying to catch up behind her. Anne denied any and all graduation parties that she was invited to, and then to top it off, she turned her phone off with the excuse of wanting to spend uninterrupted time with her adoptive parents. 

However, despite _telling_ her friends that she was spending time with Matthew and Marilla, Anne had distanced herself from them, too. She knew that they noticed this, but to her relief, they had yet to confront her and simply let her come and go each day with concerned looks on their faces. The week after graduation, Anne’s typical day involved leaving Green Gables with a book in her hands and plans of finding a new tree to sit under. She enjoyed the distraction that reading brought her, and found that getting lost in a book meant she didn’t have to think of her current predicament. On the days when her mind buzzed and couldn’t be shut off with a new tale, she took the bus into town to spend time with Diana at her family’s pharmacy. Diana had become a friend over the past two weeks, not only because she knew that she was pregnant, but because Anne had discovered she was a fellow kindred spirit at heart. 

The new routine worked magnificently until Gilbert finally managed to corner her. 

Earlier in the day, she had gone to her doctor who confirmed, _of course_ , that she was indeed pregnant. Anne had planned to walk over to get her prenatal vitamins from the Barry's pharmacy, but before she could even make the short trek there, the dark clouds that had been littering the sky finally let the rain in them loose. She ducked into a coffee shop to escape the heavy droplets, and tucked herself into a corner with a book to wait for the rain let up. Anne was there no longer than ten minutes before the entrance door opened, and she looked up just in time to make eye contact with the very boy she had been trying to stay away from. Gilbert Blythe moved toward her swiftly, and Anne could do nothing but place her book on the table and await her fate. 

“Anne,” Gilbert said as he approached her, “i’ve been calling you.” 

“My phone has been off.” She said feebly, gesturing for him to sit. He pulled the chair across from her out, plopping down into it. 

“Yeah, I noticed.” 

Anne looked down, somewhat ashamed. Across from her, Gilbert cleared his throat. 

“What’s wrong, Anne?” Gilbert implored. “Is this about Boston University? Have you heard back from them?” 

Anne looked up at him, her eyebrows pulled down in confusion until she realized that she had never told him about her acceptance letter in the mail. What was she supposed to tell him now? That, yes, she had been accepted, but no, she wouldn’t be attending because she had been knocked up by a boy that refused to return her calls since he found out? 

“I haven’t heard anything, yet.” She said, fiddling with her book. “What about you? Have you heard from Harvard?” Gilbert’s eyebrows shot down at her response, but Anne could see a small smile forming at the corner of his lips. 

“I tried to tell you at graduation, but you left before I could.” Gilbert said. “I got in.” 

Anne did her best to smile at him, but it felt forced. She was proud of him, so incredibly proud, but there was a tiny part of her that wished he hadn’t gotten in at all. Anne was ashamed of it, and desperately regretted even thinking it, but nevertheless, it was there. The reason _why_ she still refused to admit. 

“Gil, that’s amazing. Congratulations!” Anne exclaimed softly, reaching forward to squeeze the hand he had on the table. 

“It’s unbelievable, right? But, that’s not all.” He informed her. “You know how I’ve been interning for Dr. Ward for the last two years? Well, after I told him that I got in, he called up one of his colleagues in Boston. Dr. Hunter-- is her name. Apparently, Dr. Ward told her so many great things that she wants me to do an internship with her this summer. Isn’t that insane?” 

“Wow,” She whispered, “that is amazing, Gil. Are you gonna do it?” She asked, holding her breath. 

“I have until tomorrow to decide.” He said, his hand messing with his hair. “I wanted to talk to you about it, first. Not just about the internship, but all of it. Harvard is amazing, but none of it really matters if I’m there without by my side.” Gilbert said honestly. 

_Oh. Oh, no._

The sudden realization of his words hit Anne like a brick to the face. Gilbert was willing to cast Harvard, his _dream_ , away for her. How could she possibly tell him now that she was pregnant and unable to go to Boston with him? Oh, damn Gilbert Blythe and his unwavering loyal character! Anne refused to even consider the thought of letting him give up the opportunity of a lifetime for her, and she opened her mouth before she even realized what she was doing.

“Gilbert, you have to accept the offer.” She ordered desperately. “I may have some… stuff to sort first, but I’ll be there in Boston.” She lied swiftly. Gilbert grinned at her, getting up from his seat. He moved across the table, and wrapped his arms around her tightly. Anne hugged him back before he pulled back to grab his phone, a grin on his face. 

“I’ll call Dr. Hunter right now.” 

__________

Over an hour later, Anne finally found herself walking into _Barry's Pharmaceuticals_. She and Gilbert had spent the whole time together talking, and while there was a lump in her throat the whole time, she couldn’t help but admit how much she missed him. 

“Where have you been? I was beginning to think your doctor told you that you weren’t up the duff and you ditched me.” Diana complained, coming out of the back room. Anne walked behind the counter, and went to stand across from her new friend. 

“Still pregnant,” Anne complained, leaning against the counter top. “And my life just got a whole lot more confusing.” 

“Oh? Well, I’m all ears.” Diana declared, hopping onto the counter and crossing her legs. Anne blew out a breath, and tossed her long braid over her shoulder in preparation. Between Anne’s detailed story-telling and Diana’s frequent pausing to help customers when they came in, it took well over an hour for her to finish telling her everything. 

“If I told him, he would have never left and his whole life would’ve been ruined, too.” Anne explained, taking the half of peanut butter and jelly sandwich from Diana’s extended hand. 

“How noble of you. I would’ve forced the bastard to stay.” Diana said, taking a bite of her sandwich. Anne got more comfortable on the chair she now sat on as she shook her head. 

“No, no. He’s not the dad, remember? That’s some other loser.” Anne explained.

“You are turning out to be a lot more interesting than you look.” She said. “Why don’t you just get rid of the thing?” 

“My parents are super religious, and I _know_ it’s my choice, but I just can’t.” Anne explained, taking a bite of her sandwich, barely swallowing before she was talking again. 

“I had my whole life planned! Move to Boston, graduate from college, and then come back to Canada to get my teaching credentials. Marriage and kids was supposed to come after all of that.”

“A whole life in bullet points,” Diana teased. “You sound like my mother.” 

“Well now it’s pregnant, have creature, full-time mother, wave goodbye to career, live off benefits, and get fat.” Anne said, putting her fingers up as she listed things off. Diana gave her a sideways look, snorting. 

“Might as well end it now. I can sort the drugs?” She offered, and Anne groaned in mock-annoyance as Diana continued. “Look, there are plenty of people that want kids that can’t have them. What if you put it up for adoption?” Anne thought it over for a moment, deciding how to answer. 

“I don’t know, Diana. I was adopted at eleven, but I lived in a _lot_ of shitty places before that. I would never wish for my baby to experience half of what I went through.” 

“My cousin gave a baby up for adoption a few years ago. The center she went through helped her choose the couple that adopted it. What if you did that? Then you could keep in touch and know that it’s happy and healthy, or whatever.” She said, finishing her sandwich. Anne hummed, thinking about it. 

“If I found a family that wanted it,” Anne started, “then I could still go to Boston. I could apply to college again, or get a job. It would just be a little later than expected. I wouldn’t even need to tell Gilbert! I could just say that I needed a gap year.” She said, nodding her head. Across from her, Diana cocked an eyebrow at her. 

“Not tell him? That is major denial, babe.” 

“Maybe,” Anne agreed, “but I happen to think that it is a genius idea.”

__________

Saying goodbye to Gilbert came too fast, and Anne hated it. 

Together, they stood on his front porch the morning that Gilbert was due to leave for Boston. His bags were already packed in the car, and the Lacroix family members had suspiciously vanished into the house to give them a moment of privacy. 

“I can reschedule my flight, you know. I don’t need to be there for a few days.” Gilbert offered, but Anne smiled sadly at him, shaking her head. 

“No, you’re getting on that plane.” Anne said sternly, silently biting her tongue to ensure she didn’t blurt out that she would _love_ for him to stay. 

“Well, it’s only two months,” Gilbert said, “then we’ll be reunited.” 

Anne nodded meekly, pulling him in for a hug to hide the tears that were in the corner of her eyes. Gilbert’s arms wrapped around her, crushing her tightly against him. Anne relished in the feeling of hugging her best friend for a moment before she pulled back, their faces inches apart, to look into his eyes. One of his hands unwrapped around her to move up to her face, wiping a rogue tear from her cheek. His hand lingered on her, and for a moment, Anne desperately wished that Gilbert would do something. _What_ , she didn’t know. What could he do in the moment that she could offer back? He was moving to another country to attend one of the most prestigious schools that one could go to, and she was preparing to twiddle her thumbs at home for the next several months because she had gotten knocked up. Anne moved back from their embrace, Gilbert’s hand falling down to his side as she did. 

“Keep in touch, okay?” Gilbert whispered, eyebrows pulled down. 

“Always,” Anne promised, “now, close your eyes, I have something for you.”

Gilbert obliged, and Anne grabbed the cherished object from the purse at her feet. She grabbed his hand, placing the object in the palm of it. He opened his eyes, though Anne knew that he already recognized what it was. 

“Your favorite fountain pen?” Gilbert asked, smiling softly as he examined it. 

“You’ll need it for your internship.” Anne informed him. 

“How will you do your writing without it?” He asked, and Anne’s smile was sad. 

“I’ll manage,” She whispered, “just give it back when I see you next.” 

Gilbert moved forward, capturing her in a hug once more. Anne hugged him like she would never get to again, only letting go when Bash came out to inform them they had to go if Gilbert wanted to make his flight. They tearfully pulled away from each other, and Anne stayed cemented to the porch long after Bash’s car disappeared into the distance. 

__________

Four months later, when Anne was nearly six months pregnant, she walked through the grocery store while half-heartedly looking for Matthew. As it turned out, telling Gilbert her spontaneous plan to take the year off had been easier than she figured it would be. He had taken it well enough, but she was just relieved to know that he was still excited to have her come eventually. Anne silently reasoned with herself that she would tell him the truth of her year, one day. Matthew and Marilla's reaction to it, while surprised and perhaps disappointed at first, took the news far better than she ever hoped them to. They were both helpful and supportive toward her decision of putting the baby up for adoption as long as Anne was sure it was what she wanted to do. 

Anne stopped her pursuit of finding her adoptive father when she found herself in front of the pickles. She grabbed a jar full of her newest pregnancy craving and as she was about to turn away, she almost ran right into someone. 

“I am so sorry!” Anne said sincerely, her hand subconsciously moving over her now noticeable baby bump. Her hand froze as she looked at the woman across from her. Although Anne hadn’t seen her in months, Mary Lacroix looked exactly as she remembered her. 

“Anne?” Mary asked in disbelief, her eyes slipping down to linger over her stomach before finding Anne’s gaze again. 

“Mary, hi.” She said, distractedly, her hand dropping from her bump. 

“I didn’t know-- I mean, Gilbert, he never mentioned that..” Mary fumbled for her words, gesturing toward her. Anne nodded slowly, inwardly beginning to freak out. How could she explain this to Mary while also persuading her to not tell Gilbert anything? 

“He doesn’t know,” Anne blurted out. “I haven’t told him.” 

“Is Gilbert.. Is he the--?” Mary asked, stumbling over her words, pulling her cardigan closer to her body.

“No, he’s not.” She insisted at once, ”but, Mary, you have to promise to not tell him.” Anne pleaded, moving forward so she could grab her hand. 

“When will you tell him?” Mary asked, shaking her head. 

“Soon.” Anne promised. She looked at her for a moment, a thoughtful look on her dark features. "I'm putting the baby up for adoption." 

“Oh, Anne.” Mary said, and opened her arms to give Anne a hug. "Fine, I won't say anything as long as you _do_ tell him." 

"I will, I swear."

“I have a lot of questions.” Mary commented, pulling back from the hug. “And I hope that you’ll answer them. I am always here to talk to, Anne. I know exactly what you’re going through right now. I was just a little younger than you when I got pregnant with Elijah.” She said, and Anne nodded solemnly. Long before Mary and Bash had met, she had had a son. From what Anne had pieced together from Gilbert and Mary throughout the years, however, was that her pregnancy had hardly been by choice. Despite the horrible situation that she was put in, Mary had raised her son Elijah to be a nice young man that Anne had the pleasure of meeting on multiple occasions. 

“Thank you, Mary.” Anne said sincerely, smiling. “I promise we’ll get together soon, okay?”

__________

“Who’s that?” Marilla asked one cold evening in December. Anne locked her phone and tossed it to the other side of the couch that she was lying on. She grabbed a few pieces of popcorn from the bowl balanced on her heavily pregnant belly before she answered Marilla. 

“Gilbert.” Anne responded, watching her adoptive mother iron another one of Matthew’s good church shirts. 

“Have you told him yet?” 

“All he needs to know is my arrival time to Boston.” Anne quipped back, shoveling more popcorn into her mouth to avoid having to say more.

From the corner of her eye, Anne saw Mary come into the parlor. There was no doubt in Anne’s mind that she would forever be grateful for Mary’s constant presence in her life over the past few months. True to her word, Mary hadn’t uttered a word to Gilbert about her pregnancy. Instead, she offered her support by becoming a true regular around Green Gables, often bringing Delphine to help Marilla bake or staying late into the night answering the questions Anne had but were out of her adoptive mother’s expertise. 

“All this fibbing is going to catch up to you, girl!” Marilla scolded. 

“Don’t fret so much, Marilla. I’ll tell him that I birthed a parasite eventually.”

“Stop it, you. Pregnancy is a sacred thing. Isn’t that right, Mary?” Marilla asked. Mary smiled softly at Marilla before turning to look at Anne. 

“Of course, Marilla. Although, I can remember calling Delphine a name or two when I was pregnant with her. Usually, when I had horrible morning sickness.” Mary said, winking at Anne. 

“I just don't think it would appreciate being called a parasite, is all.” Marilla explained. “Or, at least I don’t think Mrs. Lynde would like you calling it that.” 

“She probably wouldn't like you calling the baby an it, either.” Anne said idly, looking down. “It’s a girl, you know.”

“You found out?” Mary asked.

“Yeah, a while back.” Anne confirmed. “The adoption agency wanted me to so we could start making plans for when the baby is born.” 

“Anne, you never mentioned that.” Marilla stated, propping the iron up. Anne simply shrugged, feeling uncomfortable with where the conversation had turned to. 

“Have you thought of any names? Even just for fun?” Mary asked, shifting closer to Anne on the couch. 

“No,” Anne said quickly. “Uh, I’m letting the new parents decide that.”

Anne moved the popcorn off of her to look at the swell of her stomach for a moment. She felt the familiar feeling of the baby shifting, and without thinking about it, pulled her shirt over her stomach for Marilla and Mary to see.

“She’s moving,” Anne explained quietly, letting the two women move toward her to gush as her stomach rippled once more. 

“Oh, look at that.” Mary gushed. 

“She’s got the hiccups! Oh, the little thing’s got the hiccups.” Marilla commented, leaning over the couch to get a better look. Anne put her finger over the spot she saw the baby move, tentatively watching as the skin there raised again. She smiled softly, in awe, before looking up. Mary was staring at her, a knowing look in her eyes. Anne looked down at once, and moved her shirt back into place. 

“Well, whatever.” Anne deflected, embarrassed that she had been caught. “The couple in Charlottetown is excited, and that’s what matters.” She turned back toward the TV that was playing a movie she wasn’t paying attention to, her heart feeling as though it had been flooded with a pang of sorrow. 

Later that night, Anne laid wide awake in the bed of her east gable room. She was propped up on her pillows, her hands wrapped securely around her baby bump. Her thumbs traced over it silently, smiling whenever she felt another movement. 

“Whenever I have the hiccups, I hold my breath like this.” Anne whispered, then took a deep breath in so she could hold it for a few seconds. When she let her breath go, Anne felt the baby move once again. She put her hand over the spot, her smile growing. 

“There you are, my Princess Cordelia.” Anne said, but her smile began to fade. “That’s probably not going to be your name though, okay?” She whispered.

“But we can pretend for now, alright? Just like we have been.” Anne whispered after a moment. “Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess named Cordelia…”

__________

Three days later, the baby was born. 

Mrs. Lynde, the nosy neighbor that only kept her mouth shut about Anne because she was Marilla’s daughter, was the midwife in charge of her at-home birth. Rachel Lynde had plenty of experience with babies, having had 12 of her own, and Anne felt safe in her hands as she coaxed her through horrible contractions and instructed her just at the right moment to push. It was only after the final push, when she fell down against the pillows in exhaustion, that Anne's feelings were instantly charged with the mesmerizing sound of the loud wails coming from the infant in the small room. Anne watched, overcome with emotion, as Mrs. Lynde and Marilla began to clean the baby across the room. Mrs. Lynde turned toward Anne, the baby now secured in a blanket within her arms, and a bright smile on her face. 

“Would you like to hold her or should I bring her straight downstairs?” Mrs. Lynde asked. Anne desperately _wanted_ to say no, to tell her to take the baby down to wait for the nice couple from Charlottetown and the adoption agency representative. The two letter word, the only thing separating her from losing all the control she had in this situation, got lodged in her throat when she heard a small noise from the bundle in the older woman’s arms. 

A tiny, little hiccup. 

Anne’s bravado broke at once, and she nodded swiftly. Mrs. Lynde moved closer to deposit the baby into her welcoming arms. Anne’s heart skipped a beat as she looked down at the newborn, her finger tracing over the little wisps of hair on her head. _Oh, she was perfect_. Anne choked out a sob, the tears she had been holding in for months now finally escaping from her grey eyes. 

“Cordelia,” She whispered, “the most perfect princess in all of the land.” 

Anne only looked away from the newborn when she felt someone sit down on the bed beside her. Marilla was smiling at her, her thumb reaching forward to wipe the tears from her freckled cheeks. 

“I thought I could do this, Marilla, but I can’t.” Anne sobbed quietly. “I thought I would be okay giving her up, but I’m not.” 

“Oh?” Marilla asked, stroking her hair. 

“I can’t do it.” Anne hiccuped. “I don’t _want_ to give her up.” 

The truth, while Anne had tried very hard to not admit to herself, was that she had wanted this baby for a while now. She tried _so_ hard to hide it, to sound excited as she spoke to possible parents or make plans for when she moved to Boston, but deep down, Anne knew it would always end like this. She hadn’t even booked her ticket to Boston like she told Gilbert she had. 

“You don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do.” Marilla murmured. Anne heard a knock from below, and her eyes grew large. Marilla smiled a little wider at her daughter, love evident in her expression. 

“Marilla--” Anne implored, her arms pulling the baby closer to her chest. 

“Do you want to keep this baby?” She asked.

“Yes,” Anne said immediately, a few more tears slipping from her eyes. 

“Well, then it seems like I have an adoption agency representative to speak to.” Marilla declared, standing up. Anne let out a shaky breath, nodding. Just as Marilla was about to turn away, she spoke again. 

“You are going to be an amazing mother, Anne.”

Anne smiled at her as she left the room, but her heart felt heavy. It felt heavy for the couple from Charlottetown who were expecting to get a baby but would now only be getting heartbreak instead. It was heavy for the life in Boston with a boy with hazel eyes and a heart of gold that she was willingly giving up. And heavy with the fear that she would never be as good of a mother that Marilla Cuthbert has been to her.


	5. The Cat's Out of the Bag

At the ripe age of seven days old, Cordelia Shirley-Cuthbert had decided her favorite activity, when not eating or sleeping, was crying. More specifically, Anne’s daughter loved to cry during the dead of night when not a sensible soul should be awake. With a finicky newborn in her arms, Anne paced the middle of her east gable room, trying desperately to rock her to sleep. 

“Cordelia… Shh, come on.” She whispered, kissing the baby’s head. “Shh, it’s okay.” 

The baby persisted in her wailing, and for that reason, Anne didn’t realize there had been a knock at her bedroom door until it had opened and Matthew poked his head into the room. She looked at her adoptive father, a helpless expression forming on her features. 

“My life is over, Matthew.” Anne declared once he entered, the door closing quietly behind him. 

“Just wait until you become a grandparent.” He replied, maneuvering through the dark room to sit on the edge of her unmade bed. She watched him for a moment before she decided to join him. They sat for a long moment, content to stare at Cordelia squirming in her arms, the tiny infant's loud crying slowly transitioning into quiet fussing. 

“You know, I remember the day the social worker brought you here like it was yesterday.” Matthew whispered idly. “They told us we were getting a quiet fifteen year old boy. Imagine our surprise when we saw you get out of the car, talking a mile a minute about your _Lake of Shining Waters._ ” 

She nodded beside him, recalling a time that felt like an eternity ago. 

Before Anne had been taken in by the Cuthberts, she had been in the custody of a horrible couple named the Hammonds. They had too many children, and not enough means or love to take care of them. Anne spent more than a few years with the Hammonds, but any good memories that she may have made were overshadowed by the pain and hardships she endured under their care. At eleven years old, the only way she believed she could get away from them was in her imagination. 

Then, Mr. Hammond died of a heart attack, and it changed everything. 

It was unexpected, and apparently, the last straw for his grieving wife. After his passing, Mrs. Hammond had decided right then and there that she wanted nothing to do with fostering, or Anne, any longer. Anne left the small Hammond cottage four days later with a trash bag full of possessions and her imagination now _truly_ soaring. She fell in love with Avonlea the very first time she drove through it with the social worker, and by the time they arrived at Green Gables, Anne had gained a newfound hope that the beautiful farm would be her last placement. 

However, it only took Marilla Cuthbert coming out the front door and declaring that there had been some sort of mistake to burst Anne’s bubble instantly. What had happened, they figured out after several calls to the agency, was that in the hustle to get her into a new home, they had pulled and sent the file of a boy that had been with the Hammond’s years beforehand instead of her own. Marilla didn’t hesitate to chew out the social worker for such a careless mistake before deciding that her and Matthew would still take her in despite the mix-up. It wasn’t often that Anne thought about the social worker that had overseen her case, but in an odd way, she owed her a thank you. Had the woman realized her mistake, Anne may not have ended up with the Cuthbert’s in the first place. 

“I had no idea how to act around you. I was so scared of the idea of being a parent, I must have jumped three feet in the air every time you walked into the room. Broke two fingers when you came into the barn that first night. I got so nervous, I slammed a hammer right down on them.” Matthew admitted, looking up to meet her surprised gaze in the dark room.

“You said that your fingers got stuck in a piece of faulty equipment,” Anne said. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth?” She asked, and Matthew looked down again. Slowly, his thumb moved forward to graze Cordelia’s cheek, her eyes drooping tiredly. 

“You weren’t part of the club.” He said, smiling softly. “But… I couldn’t be happier that you are now. For a long time, I wasn’t sure if these walls would ever get to see a baby in them again.” 

“You aren’t disappointed?” She asked, her voice uncharacteristically small. “That I had a baby so young? Or that all the plans I made have had to be put on the back-burner?” 

Matthew put his arm around his daughter comfortingly, pulling her close so he could kiss her forehead without disturbing the now slumbering baby. 

“Anne-girl,” He said as she put her head on his shoulder. “When will you realize that I could never be disappointed in you?”

__________

In order to preserve her sanity, Anne had developed a list of rules to live by when it came to motherhood. 

The first was to avoid breastfeeding in public if one was not in the mood to deal with the snide comments inevitably made by the older women of Avonlea. She’d learned this lesson after coming into _Barry’s Pharmaceuticals_ to see Diana after Cordelia’s six week check-up. Anne had been sitting in the backroom, the door open to hear Diana talking while she stocked inventory up-front, when she realized it was time for her daughter’s feeding. It had become so normal for Anne to unbutton her top and undo the clasp on her nursing bra without hearing a complaint that she almost forgot that she lived in a small farming town full of occupants that were very vocal about their outdated beliefs. 

A woman, that Anne did _not_ know, had been in the perfect position up front that gave her a full view of Cordelia’s feeding adventure. What had then ensued for the next ten minutes could only be described as a total adult meltdown. The woman had declared that Anne was exposing herself in what _used_ to be a respectable establishment, and while Anne never typically backed down from putting an ignorant person in their place, she also had a daughter who still cried through most nights. So, Anne had closed the door, let Diana give the woman an earful in her honor, and mentally filed the rule away. 

The second rule was to always turn on the light in the middle of the night. Anne made the mistake of not doing so more times than she could count, but only deemed it rule worthy after one particular instance. She had gotten out of bed to get to her crying daughter, and had taken only two steps toward her bassinet when Anne tripped over a shoe and went flying face first into the wood flooring. Two minutes later, never cry when Cordelia cries became rule three. And, while these were all good to follow, the fourth one had to be the most important rule of all. 

_Never assume trouble isn’t right around the corner._

Anne should have known it was too good to be true when she went out for a walk with Cordelia a week after her 19th birthday. The warm, sunny weather was just too tempting after the harsh winter they experienced so, instead of debating whether she should or not, Anne dressed them snuggly, strapped Cordelia to her chest, and set off on their journey. She talked her daughter through their whole walk, excitedly expressing her happiness wherever she found another sign that spring was approaching Avonlea. Anne got so lost in their walk that she didn’t realize that they had made their way through the forest near Green Gables until Anne was met by the sight of the small shopping center located in the outskirts of town. 

“Oh, Cordelia, should we do a little window shopping?” Anne asked, earning a small noise from the baby’s head against her chest. She smiled at her, putting her hand on her back, and looked up just in time to see a blonde woman exit from the store Anne stood in front of. They made eye contact, and Anne inwardly swore as the woman approached her. 

“ _Anne?_ ” Winifred Rose asked, stopping in front of her, her eyes trained on her chest. “Is that yours?” She asked, a manicured finger jutting out to point at Cordelia. 

“No.” She said without thinking. Anne was _not_ ashamed to admit she was Cordelia’s mother, oftentimes spouting off to strangers in the grocery store or local coffee shop about any new milestone her daughter had hit, but telling Winnie that was a bit different. In telling Winnie, she would likely be inadvertently telling someone else. More specifically, a someone else in Boston who Anne had not returned a single phone call to since the birth of her daughter three months ago. 

“So, you’re like, what? A nanny?” 

“Oh, yeah.” Anne stuttered, her hand moving to rest over the wisps of red hair growing atop Cordelia’s head. “It’s… Good money.” She said, nodding quickly. Winnie gave her a look, her eyebrow raised. 

“I thought you were going to school in Boston with Gilbert.” She stated, moving forward to get a peak of the baby despite the fact that Cordelia was facing her chest.

“Oh, no, no, no, I realized that taking care of children is the only education you really need.” Anne lied, her voice faltering when Winnie finally got a view of Cordelia when the baby turned her head to the side.

“Come on, Anne.” Winnie said. “She looks just like you.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Winnie.” Anne said, stepping back. “But, it was nice seeing you.” 

She didn’t wait for Winnie to respond before Anne had turned and practically ran toward the direction that she came, fleeing the scene entirely. Her heart hammered in her chest the whole way home, her mind wandering further and further away the closer they got. They arrived back at Green Gables, and Anne was grateful that Marilla was there waiting to steal Cordelia away from her. When she got up to her bedroom, Anne picked up her phone and sauntered over to collapse on her bed. She held the device close to her chest, pondering over what she should do. 

On one hand, Anne knew that she needed to call Gilbert. It was a long overdue conversation that she needed to have with her best friend, but still, she hesitated. There was the possibility that Winnie wouldn’t say anything to him, or that they weren’t even in contact anymore. If she hadn’t even known that Anne wasn’t in Boston, she likely hadn’t spoken to Gilbert in months either. Anne bit her lip, contemplating. She didn’t necessarily _need_ to call Gilbert today, right? There would always be tomorrow or the day after to speak with him… 

Anne threw her phone to the bottom of her bed, sitting up. 

“I’ll call him tomorrow.” She promised, leaving the phone behind as she went downstairs to help Marilla prepare a late lunch. 

__________

Anne didn’t call Gilbert like she promised she would. 

At first, she blamed it on the fact that it simply slipped her mind. Since having her daughter, Anne’s mind was usually in overdrive thinking about tummy time or whether Cordelia’s diaper needed changed. By the time that she did remember that she never called, two weeks had already passed, and Anne reasoned that it wouldn’t hurt if she let herself off the hook for a little while longer. But, she was Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, and life would never be _that_ easy on her. 

Anne had been right in the middle of folding a load of Cordelia’s laundry when she heard a knock at the door. She absent-mindedly wandered toward the front entrance, an unfolded towel thrown haphazardly over her shoulder, and didn’t bother to check who stood on the other side before she opened it. Her friendly smile, previously fastened on her features, fell in an instant.

“Gilbert,” Anne breathed out. “What are you doing here?” She asked, opening the door wider for him to enter. She looked at the side table next to the door, hurriedly grabbing one of Cordelia’s pacifiers and a lone baby sock so she could throw them into the drawer before Gilbert could see. 

“I’m on spring break.” Gilbert said, entering the house. “I thought I should come over and surprise you.” 

“Well, I’m surprised! Let’s go out and grab a coffee…” Anne said, trying to grab his arm and get him out of the house once more. 

“No, no! Let’s just stay here and catch up.” He insisted, sliding out of his coat. 

While he busied himself with hanging up the garment, Anne moved down the hallway. As she went, she found herself picking up every little thing that belonged to Cordelia hurriedly. Her daughter was so small, yet made more of a mess than the three other occupants together. At three months old, no less! Anne stuffed the stray crinkling moose toy and a baby sling into the laundry basket full of her daughter's clothing. She grabbed the towel from her shoulder, effectively hiding the contents of the basket just in time to turn around and see Gilbert enter the kitchen. Anne slipped past him, moving toward the sink. 

“So, what have you been up to?” Anne asked, tossing an array of baby bottles that had been drying back into the soapy water, carefully shielding them from view as she did. 

“Oh, this and that, you know?” He shrugged cryptically, leaning his back against the counter. Anne bit her lip for a moment, glancing over to get a better look at him. His hair, usually a mop of unruly curls, had been cut and styled. And, was Anne imagining that he looked more tired? Slimmer, maybe? Nevertheless, Gilbert was still as handsome as he always was. 

“Nice haircut,” Anne mentioned, reaching toward the shelf above her head to grab two mugs. “It suits you.”

“Thank you,” Gilbert replied. “Are you okay? You seem a little stressed.” 

“Do I?” She said feebly, abandoning the mugs to begin opening drawers in search of tea bags. 

“Just a little.”

“Well, I’m alright.” She deflected. “How are your classes? Enjoying them?” 

“Oh, they’re fantastic! We’ve been studying obstetrics, in fact.” He revealed, and Anne hardly spared him a look as she began opening more cabinets, now in search of the tea kettle. They _really_ did just need to find a designated spot for it already!

“Really?” Anne asked, though she was now hardly paying attention to his words. In her mind, she was trying to figure out how to get Gilbert out of the house as fast as she could. They could drink their tea in the front and then she could tell him that… 

“There’s so much to learn.” Gilbert said. “How do you find these breast pumps, by the way? Some women don’t like them.”

“They’re a total nightmare--” Anne said, freezing as she realized her mistake. Slowly, Anne turned to face him, the kitchen deadly silent. Gilbert had an unreadable expression on his face, eyebrows pulled so far down that it looked as though it could physically hurt. His hands braced themselves against the counter, his head rigidly facing forward. 

“How did you…” She asked quietly, her voice trailing off. 

“Winnie.” 

“I wasn’t sure if you two were still talking.” She whispered. “I was going to tell you, Gilbert, I--” She started to say, but was cut off by another voice coming from down the hall. 

“Anne, who was at the-- Oh, Gilbert, hello.” Marilla Cuthbert said, pausing as she entered the room. 

“Hello, Ms. Cuthbert.” 

Marilla lingered in the doorway, Cordelia quietly sleeping in her arms, and looked toward her daughter. Anne kept a stoic look on her face as she crept across the room. She held her arms out in invitation for Marilla to hand the baby over, her eyes unable to meet what she could only assume to be a concerned expression. 

“Gilbert and I are going to go up to my room.” Anne announced, adjusting Cordelia in her arms. “We have a lot to talk about.” 

Anne didn’t wait to hear whether or not he was following before she took off toward her room. The stairs creaked below her weight, and while she was slightly nervous that the sound would wake Cordelia, she was relieved to hear a second set of creaks coming from behind her. Anne walked into her room, letting Gilbert close the door behind him as she went to sit on her bed. Carefully, Anne deposited her daughter onto the middle of the duvet, and after checking to make sure she wouldn’t wake, turned to Gilbert. 

“Come sit,” She pleaded, trying desperately to swallow the lump in her throat. Gilbert seemed to be trying to decide what he should do, his jaw twitching, before he looked down and shook his head. Slowly, he walked toward her and sat down on the edge of the bed, his eyes trained down on the sleeping baby. As he did, Anne couldn’t help but think of all the times before that they had been in this position. She thought back to all of the late night study sessions, the secrets they whispered to no one but each other, and every conversation they had that ended with them rolling on the floor with laughter. They’d shared so many memories here in this room, on this bed, but it felt like a lifetime ago. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me the truth?” Gilbert asked quietly. Anne was at a loss for what to say, unsure of how she could respond to such a loaded question. 

“I..” She started. “I guess I didn’t because I didn’t want to hold you back. You were so excited to go, and if I told you, then you would have stayed and given up your dream. I just couldn’t let you do that.”

“Anne, I already told you…” He said, his eyes meeting hers. “None of it matters without _you_. I couldn’t care less about where I am or what I’m doing if I don’t have you to talk to at the end of the day.”

She felt tears prick at her eyes, and without thinking, she moved forward to throw her arms over his shoulders to give him a hug. Oh, how she missed being able to hug Gilbert Blythe. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you! I was selfish, and rude for shutting you out.” She sputtered, the tears falling as his arms wrapped around her. 

“I know now, and that’s what matters.” He reminded her, pulling her close. Anne isn’t sure how long they stayed there, her quietly crying against his chest and him rubbing her back, but the moment is broken when Cordelia stirred awake. Anne wiped her eyes as she shifted to lie down by her daughter, Gilbert soon following to lay on the other side. 

“You know, I still haven’t been properly introduced to this little cutie.” Gilbert whispered idly. Anne glanced at him, her hand reaching out to rest over her daughter’s wiggling form. 

“Gilbert Blythe, I’d like you to meet Cordelia Shirley-Cuthbert.” She said, lips lifting into a grin. Gilbert grinned, too, his finger delicately extending to let Cordelia wrap her tiny hand around it. 

“Hello, Cordelia.” He said, his eyes shifting up. “She’s gorgeous, Anne.” She nodded in agreement. 

“What happened to Roy?” Gilbert asked a moment later, his voice soft. She sighed, rolling her eyes. 

“He miraculously got offered a job at his father’s company overseas. I haven't heard from him since.” Anne responded, her head shifting to touch her daughter’s. 

“Dickhead.” 

“Dickhead.” She agreed, then after a moment she spoke again. “I think another reason why I didn’t tell you was because it would make all of this real. By not telling you, I could rationalize that I was still the same Anne that I was before you left. Not this new, strange version of myself.”

“I get it. I just… I want you to feel like you can talk to me as any version of yourself. To me, you’ll always be Anne. My imaginative, fiery-tempered best friend who isn’t afraid to speak her mind or break a chalkboard over my head to put me in my place.” He smiled, his eyebrows wiggling mischievously. “And, hopefully, you’ll also be my goddaughter’s mother?” 

“You want to be her godfather?” 

“If the spot isn’t already filled…” He trailed off seriously, but his eyes were crinkling in amusement. 

“Gilbert, I would love nothing more than for you to be her godfather.” Anne answered, her grin somehow widening more. She watched as he expertly scooped Cordelia into his arms, having had plenty of practice with Delphine, and began to speak to her about all of the adventures that he and Anne had been on when they younger. Anne's heart felt full, from both the effortless way he spoke to her daughter and the way that her world felt as though it had been righted once again.


	6. Time Keeps Moving On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the note at the end, but just a quick little thing I need to say first. If you read chapter one when I originally posted it months ago, you may remember that I mentioned Ruby Gillis in it. I ultimately ended up changing it to Jane because I needed Ruby for reasons that you'll see in this chapter. Please bear with me here as you read because yes, Ruby is a little out of character for herself, but not at all for the character she is replacing in Love, Rosie. So, with that in mind, enjoy this long overdue chapter.

Gilbert hated to leave Anne to go back to Boston. 

“I’ll be back in Avonlea this summer.” He had told her. “You won’t even realize I’m gone.”

Anne had come to see him off the morning of his flight, Cordelia along with her until the Lacroix’s had stolen her away for a visit inside the house. Standing on his family’s porch, the pair facing each other, Gilbert was at once reminded of the last time he had to say goodbye to Anne. He stared at her now, desperately trying to memorize every freckle on her face, hoping that it would be enough to keep him sane until he could see her again. 

“Promise?” She asked, extending her pinky toward him. 

“Cross my heart,” he swore, looping his pinky with hers. “Hope to die.” 

“Stick a needle in your eye?” 

“No, maybe not that.” Gilbert grimaced, pulling his finger away as Anne began to laugh. 

He had hugged her then, unable to justify not hugging her when he knew he wouldn’t have the opportunity to for months. They stayed like that for a long moment, and despite every muscle, joint, and limb telling him to stay in the embrace, Gilbert pulled back. 

“Take care, Anne.” He had told her, and that had been it. Their goodbye ending unceremoniously with the appearance of Bash and Cordelia. He handed the infant off to Anne as he went toward the car, and Gilbert could only give her one last smile before he followed behind him. He watched her until they rounded the bend in the road, any sight of her fiery red-hair vanishing with it. 

“You still haven’t told her.” Bash told him later as they were taking his luggage from the trunk at the airport. Gilbert dropped his duffle bag to the ground, sparing a confused look toward the man he considered a brother. 

“What?” 

“Anne.” He supplied, not bothering to look toward him as he closed the empty trunk. “You still haven’t told her that you’re in love with her.”

Gilbert comically opened his mouth at once, floundering, but ready to deny any such feelings for his best friend, but Bash cut him off before he could. 

“I’ve seen you with girlfriends before, Winifred Rose included, but I’ve never seen you look at a single one of them the way that you look at Anne Shirley-Cuthbert.” Bash declared, finally meeting his eye. Bash watched as Gilbert let out an exaggerated scoff, a frown forming on the young man’s face at the same time his eyebrows knitted together, troubled. 

“I don’t have feelings for Anne,” Gilbert insisted, crossing his arms. “And, even if I ever did, she’s never felt the same way.” He reached down to grab his duffle bag from the ground, and raised his free arm.

“I have a flight to catch.” 

Bash opened his arms, crushing Gilbert in a hug, and making him drop his duffle on the floor once more. When they pulled away, the older of the two clapped the younger one on the shoulder, smiling at him as if he knew something that Gilbert did not. 

“Just remember that you’ll never really know how she does or doesn’t feel about you unless you actually talk to her about it.”

__________

Bash’s words did little to ease Gilbert, and if anything, they made him feel worse than he did before he left his front porch. By the time he arrived back to his dorm building, he felt positively depressed for no reason other than the fact that sometimes not knowing was easier than dealing with the heartbreak of having the truth confirmed. 

Gilbert decided that sometimes ignorance was bliss. 

Opening the door to his dorm, Gilbert was instantly engulfed by the sound of loud music and a thick scent of marijuana. Thankfully his roommate, Moody Spurgeon Macpherson, was alone when Gilbert walked into the room. He dropped his duffle bag to the ground with a satisfying thud before he kicked it toward his desk. Gilbert turned to look at Moody, who was fumbling for his phone to turn off the music while holding a joint between his fingers. 

“How was Canada?” He asked, offering the joint to him. Gilbert shook his head, declining, before turning toward his half of the room that looked as though it had been destroyed in a Moody tornado. His roommates clothes and other possessions were scattered all over his bed and Gilbert focused on throwing them back toward the other side of the room before he answered. 

“It was fine.” He shrugged, noncommittally. 

“Just fine?” Moody asked from his bed. “I’m guessing it didn’t go over well with the girl, then.” 

“What are you talking about?” Gilbert asked, turned around at once. Moody took a moment to take a puff and exhale before he spoke. 

“You spent all of last semester talking about _Anne_. If you weren’t talking to her directly then you were talking about her to anyone who would listen. I mean, you literally booked a flight home in the middle of the semester to go visit her after one call with a chick named-- fuck, what was it? Winnie?” Moody explained, pausing to take another puff as Gilbert tried to pick his jaw off from the ground. 

”You listen to my phone calls?” He asked, and Moody shook his head as he exhaled. 

“I don't normally, but that particular one piqued my interest.” He explained. “And since the trip was just _fine_ , I’m guessing what she told you had some truth to it?” Gilbert looked at his roommate before he collapsed down on his bed. Gilbert liked Moody, though he wouldn’t mind if he were a tad bit more neat. Moody, who was easily one of the smartest guys Gilbert had met since starting at Harvard, has always wanted to pursue a career in music but was instead on the road to becoming a doctor to appease his parents' impossibly high standards. Gilbert had spent a lot of time with his roommate, listening to the dark-haired boy strum on a guitar and sing, and he considered him a friend. 

He let out a breath, holding out his hand for Moody to pass him the joint. Gilbert didn’t often smoke, and had only done so a few times throughout high school, but his inexperience didn’t deter him from taking a hit when Moody handed it over. Gilbert exhaled, then had to take a moment to cough before he responded. 

“Her baby's name is Cordelia, and she's three months old now.” Gilbert confirmed, taking another hit without coughing, before he passed it back. "I didn't even know she was pregnant." 

“Shit, dude.” His friend responded. “Well, fuck, now we need to go out.” 

“What? Why?” Gilbert asked, puzzled. 

“Because otherwise you’ll start doing that thing you do when you're upset.” 

“What _thing_?” He asked. 

“Well, I started to notice it around January.” Moody supplied sheepishly before his face became serious. “You get into this funk, man. You throw yourself into your work, like, obsessively. You don’t eat, you don’t sleep. It's like you become an empty shell of a person.”

Gilbert was at a loss for words momentarily as his friend cleared his throat to fill the quiet room. He tried to think back to the beginning of the semester, his mind trying to conjure up memories to refute what he said, but it came back blank. It had been true that Gilbert had started paying more attention to his academics as this semester progressed, largely due to the fact that studying meant forgetting that a certain girl wasn’t answering his messages, but he didn’t realize that anyone might have noticed this change. Or, if they had, that they would _care_. 

“It was nothing..” He said feebly, but he knew it was a bust. Moody had seen exactly what Gilbert was going through and hadn’t believed the excuses he made. 

Moody held up a hand, stopping him. “Listen, I get it. Your best friend from childhood suddenly stopped talking to you and you had no idea why. But, shit, dude, you were starting to scare me. I thought we were going to need to have one of those interventions.” Moody said, shaking his head. “You want to know why we’re going out tonight? Because the dynamic of your friendship with Anne has just changed forever, and that is going to be hard to adjust to. I don’t want to see my best friend retreat to such a low place ever again. So grab your coat, we’re going out and getting wasted.” He concluded, standing up from his bed. 

Gilbert stood, too, and realized that he had been blind not to realize that Moody had become one of his best friends. He clapped his friend on the shoulder and smiled at him. “Thank you, Moody.” 

It was approximately thirty minutes later that he regretted going out with Moody. 

Gilbert leaned against the wall in the backyard of the house the two had ended up at, a beer in his hand and no Moody in sight. He watched the people around him quietly, and wondered why his life couldn’t be as uncomplicated as the fellow college students around him. 

“The last time I looked as depressed as you do right now, I almost hanged myself with my favorite tie.” A voice with a distinctive French accent said beside him. Gilbert looked over just in time to see a man around his age with a bright smile and hair in his eyes stick his hand out for him to shake. “Hi, I’m Jerry.” 

“Gilbert.” He said, shaking the man's hand. 

“I don’t mean to bother you in the middle of, well, whatever brooding you’re doing right now, but I’ve been sent to play fairy Godmother.” Jerry explained, his eyes crinkling in the corners as he continued to smile. 

“You don’t really look the part.” He said, taking a swig from his beer. 

“My friend, Ruby, sent me over here.” Jerry said, pointing across the yard. Gilbert turned to look over there, meeting the eye of a cute blonde girl who smiled and waved at him. “She thinks you’re cute, but was too nervous to come over here herself.” 

He nodded, looking over again. Ruby was now walking toward them, a red solo cup in her hand. 

“Hey.” She said, stopping in front of them. 

“Hey.” Gilbert said, smiling at her. Ruby was cute, Gilbert thought. She was much shorter than him, even with the apparent heels she was wearing. Her hair was long, blonde, and curled the same way that Anne did hers sometimes. She wore a pretty pink dress with a white cardigan slung over her shoulders. 

“Everybody’s been wondering why the cute, mysterious Canadian boy from class looks so sad.” She giggled, her eyes fluttering as she spoke. 

“Sorry,” He smiled. 

“It’s time for you to realize you’re here with us and that...” Ruby said, moving closer to him so she could whisper. “...we might actually be fun to be around.” 

Gilbert laughed, forgetting Jerry’s presence entirely as he pointed at her drink. “Do you want another?” 

“I would love one.”

__________

“Happy first birthday, Cordelia!” Gilbert enthused, grinning at his goddaughter through the Facetime call. Cordelia smiled, a wide one with her dimples on full display, before her attention focused on trying to remove the oversized birthday hat from her inherited red-haired head. The camera suddenly shifted away from her to reveal Anne. 

“She loves the book you got her. She hasn’t put it down since she opened it.” She reported, holding the book up for him to see through the screen. “She knows it’s from Gilby, isn’t that right, ‘Delia?” 

“Gilby!” A tiny voice said from Anne’s side, and Gilbert laughed. 

“I’m glad she enjoys it.” He said sincerely, but his smile turned down a little. Anne came closer to the camera, seeming to be trying to see something. 

“What?” Gilbert asked. 

“Something’s wrong.” Anne matter-of-factly stated. Gilbert suddenly laughed, his heart full knowing his best friend could still read him perfectly through a phone screen. 

“Nothing’s wrong, I just wish I could come home this Christmas, you know? I wanted to, Anne, really. I would much rather be spending it in Avonlea than being all alone in my dorm room.” He revealed, adjusting his arm when it began to get sore holding his phone up. Gilbert hadn’t been back home since the summer, where he had spent more time in the Cuthbert home than his own, and he missed it desperately. 

“We all wish you could come home, too.” Anne said, moving Cordelia back into the frame so she could wrap an arm around her daughter. “Although, according to Mary, you won’t be alone the whole time. You’re meeting Ruby’s parents, aren’t you?” 

Gilbert laid down on his bed, nodding his head. “Yeah, I am.” 

“You love her, then? You’re happy?” Anne asked, and Gilbert felt an unexplained pang in his heart as he stared at his best friend. The dynamic of their friendship had changed, as Moody had said it would, but it had been for the better. With Cordelia, he felt as though him and Anne’s friendship had strengthened tremendously. 

“I do.” He nodded, then cleared his throat self-consciously. Gilbert was in love with Ruby, wasn’t he? They had said their _I love you’s_ months ago, and he had meant it, but why was it suddenly so easy to doubt it when he was telling Anne that he did? He thought back to what Bash had said to him so many months ago as he was about to go back to Boston. Gilbert had never been in love with Anne, had he? Sure, growing up he probably had a crush on her at _some_ point, like most boys with a girl best friend, but that didn’t equal love. He pushed the thought away at once, and thought of Ruby instead. His sweet, kind girlfriend who he loved. 

“I’ve never been happier, Anne.” He promised, but a memory of a bar and a birthday girl filled his mind before he could push it away.

__________

May 6th

Dear Gilbert, 

Oh, I do love how we’ve started sending letters to one another. While I always enjoy our calls and texts, there’s just something exciting about a written letter! Perhaps because it feels as though we are two reunited friends exchanging letters during the turn of the century? I can imagine you off exploring the world while I stay in Avonlea eagerly waiting to read all about your newest adventure. I suppose that isn’t so far off from reality. You’re off in America, about to graduate from Harvard in only a few weeks, and I’m in Avonlea waiting to hear all about it. 

Although it may not be as exciting as graduation, I do have news to report! Diana and I have both gotten jobs at the new hotel in town. She got a great gig as the Assistant Manager after all those years working for her parents. Diana has grown so much since I met her four years ago, and her kindred spirit never ceases to amaze me. And me, well, I’m just a maid at the moment, but I have my eye on a promotion to reception. And that’s not all! With this new job, I’m finally going to be able to move out of Matthew and Marilla’s. I’ll miss them terribly, but it's time that Cordelia and I start the next chapter of our lives. Diana and I have found a place to share, it’s tiny, but even Cordelia will be able to have her own little room there. We should be fully moved in by the time you come home in a few weeks. 

Cordelia hasn’t stopped talking about you coming and the possibilities of her new room since I told her. I’m not sure which one she talks about more. Her and Dellie are in the parlor right now, and they both told me to tell you that they say “hello, Gilby.” I do hope they never outgrow calling you that, but even if they do, you’ll always be Gilby to me-- and Bash. 

While I was cleaning out a room today at work, I came across a magazine with no one other than Winifred Rose on the cover of it. Are you two still friends? I haven’t seen her since, well, you know when. It seems like her modeling career took off the way she always hoped, so good for her! 

I suppose that’s all for now, Gilbert. Give Ruby my best wishes, and take care of yourself. I want you to be in one piece when you come to visit! 

Love,  
Anne

__________

“Gilby!” Cordelia yelled, and before Gilbert could even do anything more than close his truck door, the three year old had sprinted across the yard and was crushing him in a hug. He picked her up at once, hugging her close. 

“Cordelia? Is that you? You’ve gotten so big!” He asked with faux surprise, pulling back to look at the girl as she giggled. While Gilbert could see the parts of her that looked like her father, the dimples and nose were begrudgingly inherited from Roy, there was no denying that she was her mother’s daughter. Cordelia had gotten her mother’s red hair and more often than not had it pulled into identical braids. Her eyes were a similar shade of grey to Anne’s, and seemed to always be taking in the world around her with the same enthusiastic curiosity. Gilbert lightly tugged on the little girl’s braid before setting her back on the ground. 

“I saw that, Gilbert Blythe.” 

Gilbert looked up and grinned, taking Cordelia’s hand to walk across the lawn to meet Anne. She stood just outside the front door, her hands on her hips in a very Marilla-esque way, but her expression amused. 

“Good thing there’s no chalkboards around then.” He joked, holding out his free arm as invitation. Anne stepped forward, hugging him. Gilbert squeezed her shoulder with his hand and kissed her forehead before he pulled back, smiling at her. “I missed you.” 

“Me, too.” She responded, grinning back. “It’s good to have you back, Grad!” 

He grinned in response, allowing Cordelia to tug him inside after she grabbed Anne’s hand as well.

Gilbert really liked Anne’s little house. She had sent pictures after they got the keys, but walking in, it was hardly the same now that Anne and Diana had decorated it. The place had three bedrooms, Diana in the master with Anne and Cordelia in the other two rooms. Right off the front hallway was the living room, and after one look, Gilbert knew the three of them had already made the house into a home. Their tiny couch was in the center of the room, filled with fun throw pillows and a blanket that Marilla had made herself thrown over the back. Cordelia’s toys were designated to one corner, but Gilbert could tell as she let go of their hands to go play that it wouldn’t likely stay that way for long. He looked at the walls, admiring the many photos that were already hung on the wall. Some were of Anne and her family while others were of Diana and hers. A candle was lit on the wood coffee table, successfully giving the room the cozy, content vibes that Anne had always said she wanted when she got her own place. 

“It looks great in here, Anne.” He told her sincerely, his eyes still roaming the room. 

“Thanks, we’ve been trying to get it in order before you got he--”

“--Anne! Charlie Sloane left his shirt in the bathroom, again. That’s the second time this we.. Oh, hello, Gilbert.” Diana tsked while she came down the hallway with a shirt in her hand, her words faltering as she met Gilbert’s confused gaze. 

“Hi, Diana.” He said idly, turning to Anne with a puzzled look. “Charlie Sloane?” 

She wasn’t looking at him, instead her gaze was on Diana who now looked as though she should’ve kept her mouth shut. Anne reached forward to grab the shirt from her friend’s hand before she finally looked at him. 

“It’s nothing serious.” She confessed, shrugging her shoulders before turning around and walking down the hall toward the kitchen. Gilbert followed behind her, unsurprised that Diana didn’t follow. 

“What does nothing serious mean?” He asked, leaning against the counter after he slid the kitchen door shut. 

“We just see each other occasionally.” Anne said, dropping the shirt on the counter next to him. Gilbert poked it with his finger, casting a critical look at her. 

“ _You_ are dating Charlie Sloane?” He questioned, scoffing as he said the words. 

“No, I’m not dating Charlie. He’s hardly boyfriend material, Gil.” She clarified, her voice calm even as she caught the look he was giving her. 

“So, you’re sleeping with Charlie Sloane? That’s worse!” Gilbert accused, angry at the idea. Charlie had been their friend in high school, but sometimes he was hardly even that. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had spoken to him! He couldn’t understand why Anne would want to be in his company, much less why she would want to have _sex_ with him. "Are you forgetting the time he told you that an overactive imagination would make you barren?" 

"We were, what? Fifteen? He grew up, and since I have a toddler running around, I think it's safe to assume that he knows I proved him wrong." Anne put her hands on her hips, her expression firm. “What exactly is the problem here, Gilbert?” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Charlie and I are both consenting adults who are free to do whatever we want. I didn’t realize that I needed your permission, my apologies.” 

Gilbert pulled a hand through his hair, unsure of how he had managed to get into an argument with Anne after five minutes of being there. _You aren’t here to start a fight_ , he thought. Time with Anne was limited as it was, and he hardly wanted to spend any of that time fighting with her about _Charlie Sloane_. So, he held up his hands in surrender, and tried very hard to hold back the insults his mind was conjuring up. 

“You’re right. It’s none of my business.” He said. “I guess it just caught me by surprise.”

Anne let her guard down at once, her scowl dropping as her hands dropped back down to her sides. “I was going to tell you, but I worried you would react the exact same way you just did.” 

“I was an ass.” Gilbert allowed, a small growing on his face as she cracked one of her own.

“You were kind of an ass.” She agreed, but then she stepped forward with her arms wide, and the argument ended as he opened his to hug her. His mind suddenly flashed with Anne and Charlie together, and that caused him to speak up before he realized he was doing. 

“I have something I need to tell you as well.” Gilbert blurted out, the words were flying out of his mouth before his mind would let him stop. “Ruby and I are moving in together.” 

Anne pulled back from the hug, her mouth hanging open comically before she realized it and closed it. 

“Oh, wow… That’s amazing, Gilbert. Congratulations.” Anne smiled, but was it his imagination or did it look as though it didn’t quite reach her eyes?

“Yeah, I mean, it makes sense. We’re both starting medical school in the fall and we’ve been together for so long that we might as well do it now.” He said, repeating the words that Ruby had told him when she brought the idea up. She had done it the night of graduation, long after their families had gone back to their hotels and the two were walking hand in hand down the streets of the city. Gilbert hadn’t given her an answer then, promising he would by the time he got back, and it seemed as though Anne had unintentionally helped him make the decision. Why, he refused to admit. 

“A new chapter.” She nodded, moving away and clearing her throat. “Now, I think we left Cordelia alone for long enough. She’s been dying to show you her new bike.”

__________

“I had a dream that I got stuck in my family’s apple orchard last night.” Gilbert said one night, his second year medical books surrounding him on the oak table. 

“Oh?” Ruby said from the kitchen, the dishes clattering in the sink as she washed them, and Gilbert watched her for a moment. The two had moved in together just a few weeks after he got back from his trip to Canada last year. While Gilbert enjoyed his girlfriend, and their apartment, he had recently started to notice that everything about the place screamed Ruby. He found it hard to find the spots in their small one bedroom apartment that showed that he was also an inhabitant of the space. 

“Yeah,” he responded, looking down. “It started out nice enough. I was walking through the rows of apple trees just like I did when I was a kid. All of a sudden it started raining. I started running through the rows trying to find my way back to the house, but it was nowhere to be seen, and I was trapped. Then, my father appeared. He was pretty far away, but I could tell he was healthy, you know? He looked like he did just before he got sick. Anyway, he looked me in the eye and he said ‘ _Gilbert, no matter where you go or what you do, don’t forget your roots_.’ Right after that, the storm stopped, and my father was gone, and the house was exactly where he had been standing. What do you think he was talking about? Do you think I’m forgetting who I was back in Avonlea?” He asked, looking up at Ruby again, waiting for her to say something. 

“I don’t know, honey, but it sounds like some sort of self-esteem issues. Maybe you should talk to someone about it.” She suggested, picking up a cup on the counter. “Oh, yeah, and you left razor clickings in the sink again this morning.” 

“Really?” Gilbert dismissed, turning back toward his books to try to end the conversation. 

“You know it gives me allergies, honey! Next time you have a dream about your father, _maybe_ he’ll tell you to not forget to check the sink.” 

“Don’t talk about my father, Ruby.” He warned, then added “I would’ve gotten it when I got home, and even if I didn’t, we do have a cleaning lady by the way!”

“What do you want her to think? That we’re a pair of _fuck-ups_?” Ruby boomed, her hands shaking. Before Gilbert could react, the glass she was holding was hurtling toward him. Luckily, it missed, but the damage had been done. Gilbert jumped to his feet at once, breathing heavily as he stared down at the glass that had just shattered against the wall behind his head. When he tore his eyes away to look at Ruby her hands were held firmly over her mouth, her eyes wide as she shook her head back and forth slowly. 

Gilbert took a deep breath and ran a shaky hand through his hair before he looked away from her entirely. He walked past her quietly, his features stoic as he grabbed his coat from the hook and opened the door. Right before he walked out, he turned back to meet her eye. 

“That’s exactly what we are, Ruby. A pair of fuck-ups.” Gilbert whispered, and with that, he left the apartment with the click of the door behind him. 

He had no idea where he was going as he took the elevator down to the lobby. No clue what he was doing as he aimlessly walked down the streets of Boston. He considered calling Moody, but his college friend had been acting distant lately and Gilbert was sure it had to do with the stress of being in medical school with little choice in the matter. So, Moody was out. He was ready to just turn back around and go back to the apartment when he spotted a familiar establishment that he and Moody had frequented religiously while they were in school together. Gilbert walked into the diner with a small smile on his face. He sat at a booth alone, his mind finally starting to clear as he pulled his phone from his back pocket to text the one person he wanted to talk to. 

**GilbyBlythe** : I miss you.

**AnneWithAnE** : I miss you, too. 

**AnneWithAnE** : It’s been too long since you’ve visited.

**GilbyBlythe** : I have an idea. 

**AnneWithAnE** : Never a good thing to hear. 

Gilbert smiled, his fingers ghosting across the keys as he typed. 

**GilbyBlythe** : What if you come to visit me, instead?

He watched the three dots appeared as she typed, his excitement of the idea of Anne coming to Boston overshadowing any of the events that had just happened with Ruby. 

**AnneWithAnE** : I would love to. 

Gilbert lingered at the diner talking to Anne for hours. By the time he ended up back at home, he was sure that Ruby would be asleep. However, as Gilbert opened the door to the apartment, he realized that all the lights were still on. He dropped his coat onto the counter before he made his way toward the living room. Sitting on the couch with her head in her hands, was Ruby. She looked up at him, her eyes red and glossy, and Gilbert felt guilty for leaving instead of just talking through what happened. 

“Listen, Ruby--” He started, but she cut him off, shaking her head as she stood up from the couch. 

“Gilbert, we need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, folks! It's been about three months since I last updated this story, and I'm truly sorry about that. I have no excuses besides the fact that sometimes life just gets in the way. I just hope the fact that it's pretty lengthy makes up for the wait. I've started my first year of college and between online classes and homework I managed to finish this chapter. I thought of this story a lot while I was away and before I wrote this chapter I actually changed a few things in it that I had already written to try to make it make a little more sense. 1. I wrote in that they used fake ID's on Anne's birthday. At the time, I didn't realize that the drinking age in PEI is actually 19 and not 18. 2. Ms. Stacy helped Gilbert and Anne get accepted to their colleges. It's very lightly implied that she did, but this was an issue that had been a mess and didn't make sense in the film so that's all I got there, guys. and 3. I changed Gilbert's backstory. Originally, I said that Gilbert went into the foster care system after John Blythe died and he ended up with Bash and Mary. However, after careful consideration, I decided to change it so that Bash and Mary were family friends who took him in after he died. This was for a few reasons. One, it didn't really fit in with who Gilbert was as a character in this story. His character seemed to have more stability and help than one that would've gone through the traumatic experiences that he was originally going through during that year before he met Bash and Mary. Two, I couldn't explain how they would be able to move back to Gilbert's old home if he was a foster kid. Gilbert was underage when his father died which means at the very least, he wouldn't have gotten the rights to the house until he was of age. At least this way we can assume that John moved the rights over to Bash in advance so he could either take care of, sell, or live in the house after he was gone. So, that's all I got. If you read this within the first few days, you probably saw a lot of typos. Hopefully I'll eventually reread and get as many as I find. But, anyway, thanks for reading! If you want, you can let me know what you think in the comments and hopefully I'll see you soon with a new chapter!! Goodbye for now :)


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